An Update On KopTalk's Charity Appeals

An article by Red Insider, a member of the blog investigation unit

Trying to get the truth from Duncon these days is like trying to pull a square peg through a round hole — never going to happen. It will be even harder now that he is currently evading everyone from his overseas bolt hole. It seems that we are not the only ones asking questions these days; later in this article, you will see that two other charities have been asking questions about statements made on KT.

Everyone is well aware of the Alder Hey appeal. It isn’t a great feeling to bring it back up again, but you should all be aware of some important follow-up information. Alder Hey never got the receipts from KopTalk, despite Duncon’s public statements.

Alder Hey are busy people who carry out important work and don’t need to get bogged down in the KT fiasco. They shouldn’t need to, either. Officially, they will not comment on the whole KT farce. While they will confirm that they did receive a donation from KT, they will not confirm they have receipts for the goods.

Believe me, we have tried to get this information from them, but there comes a time when you have to leave them alone and let them concentrate on the important issues.

Read the rest of this entry »

Receipts shown by Konman – but something still seems wrong

Duncan Oldham, owner of Koptalk, finally produced some “receipts” tonight from the Alder Hey collection. ‘At last!’ I thought, what a great way to end the year. Finally a positive post about Koptalk.

Except that’s not quite how it worked out.

I’ll not go through all the problems, but seeing as the only way to get Dunk to respond to anything is to put it here (he ignores all the emails I send as “Insider”) I’ll put my initial concerns here for him to address. Or knowing him, for him to attempt to brush under the carpet.

First of all, the receipt for “Gameplay”.

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There are four items, but only three prices. 22.99, 34.99 and 39.99. I add this up as £97.97. The receipt shows a total of 112.96. So the item without a price must come to £14.99. Why’s it not showing as that on the receipt though? Has Dunk been using Photoshop to do more than just hide the address etc?

Also this receipt does not show how the payment was made – card/cash/vouchers. We need that information Dunk if you are to get off the hook over this.

I’ve noticed a potential issue with artifacts from the image, it could be caused by you having tried to change something on there, it could be innocent. Please supply a higher resolution version of the image for us to use to look properly at whether or not you doctored parts of the image you shouldn’t have. It will make it easier for us to see if the actual missing price was missing or if it was removed by you using Photoshop.

The second of the two pages shows three items which add up to £54.97. The total on the page shows £152.94. Adding the £97.97 from the first page to the £54.97 on the second page gives us the figure of £152.94. But we’ve noticed that the sub-total on the first page says £112.96. It all seems a bit odd – perhaps you should provide a higher resolution version of this receipt too.

Additionally you should get a screenshot of the order page from the Gameplay website – if you don’t know how to get screenshots let us know – it’s really easy. Lots of your members have done it to show us various goings on from Koptalk in the last few months.

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The Amazon receipts has you in a bit of bother too Duncan. Remember what we said about gift vouchers?

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Now £12.99 isn’t a massive amount, but it’s still an amount. You shouldn’t have been using the gift vouchers you already had to pay for goods.

There were five items on this receipt (or four items, with a quantity of 2 on one of the items if you prefer). Prices were 234.03, 28.08, (2 x 11.06) = 22.12 and 32.33. That’s pre-VAT. I total that up as £316.56.

Amazon don’t total it up yet the way their receipts work. They add postage, in this case £7.65 and take off Gift Certificates, in this case £12.99. I work that out at £311.22.

Amazon don’t though. The work it out as £324.21 for some strange reason. A difference of £12.99. That’s probably the gift certificate – unneccessary confusion because Dunk wasn’t supposed to be using any.

VAT isn’t added yet, and Amazon calculate that at £54.81. There’s no VAT on the postage, so it should be 17.5% of 316.56. I’d appreciate anyone reading this to check this for me – because Amazon seem to have charged VAT on £313.20. I know we’re only talking a couple of quid, but sometimes it’s descrepancies of a couple of quid that prove some kind of fraud has gone on elsewhere. Anyone who’s familiar with how all this really should be worked out please check my calculations! (I’m rushing things a little here prior to going out for NYE!)

The final total shows £367.96, which if you knock off the VAT of £54.81 comes to 313.15. I’m probably doing something wrong in my calculations here, but is it possible Dunk’s doctored this receipt too? Has he tried to change the figures showing a much higher amount taken as gift vouchers and got his sums wrong? Have I got my sums wrong? Have Amazon got theirs wrong? HELP!

This receipt shows the rest of the money was paid by Switch, so assuming we can work out why those other figures don’t seem to add up then the only problem would be the use of that £12.99 gift voucher. There is a possible good explanation for this, but without access to the now deleted original Alder Hey threads it’s impossible to check if this potential good explanation was mentioned. Dunk – explain the gift voucher.

Another point I’ve noticed is that the Euro amounts are supposed to have been converted at 1.48 Euros to the Pound Sterling. The individual items seem to convert OK, but by the time it’s totalled up it’s out by a bit more. This could be a rounding issue – but it could be that the figures on the total line have been doctored. Any visiting experts could do me a big favour by checking this!

As for the Argos receipts – well I’m sorry Dunk but you need to do better than this. You went to Argos twice. You have two receipts. You have split the receipts up into 14 small images and have hidden far too much of the detail – it seems once again you’ve got something to hide. You’ve obviously managed to scan the receipts in full, possibly as two separate images per receipt if the receipts are longer than a piece of A4 paper. At the most there should be 4 images, not 14!

Get the four images, and then do what you did with the Gameplay and Amazon receipts. Blank out anything that is personally identifiable to you. I doubt very much that you’ve got anything more to hide than the actual card number, and it’s not always the case that the full card number is recorded on receipts these days. There should be some lines saying something like…

Amount Due: XXX.XX.
Switch: XXX.XX
Vouchers: XXX.XX
Total Paid: XXX.XX

That’s why I think you’ve hidden this – you’ve paid by voucher instead of cash. You had, off the top of my head, about £170 in vouchers sent to you, and there should be nothing more than that showing on the receipt. Let’s see the receipts in full please, with just personal information blanked out.

This statement from you is bullshit isn’t it? “The main receipts for the goods we purchased this year were far too long to fit into the scanner so we’ve broken them down and enlarged where possible to make them clearer for you.” You had to scan the whole receipts in before you could edit them in Photoshop! People aren’t as thick as you are Duncan, so don’t expect them to fall for things that only very thick people would fall for.

Why should anyone need to bother Alder Hey? Your other statement about the missing payment details: “We have removed the card payment details but Irene has this information on the actual receipts” is not good enough. We want to see the receipts ourselves without having to bother Irene.

We also need a total of how much was collected. Reinstate the thread showing who pledged what. Let’s add the final totals up ourselves. How can you tell us you went “over budget” if you can’t prove how much was collected. What happened to Marcel’s £26.00 too?

And in all three cases – Amazon, Argos and Gamplay – we’ve got to work out how much commission you got. I doubt you got any for Argos (unless you used the reservation service first) but you certainly got up to 5% from Amazon.

So, to summarise…

1) Gameplay receipts. Clarify why there is a missing price for one of the items and why the totals are out from one page to the next. Show proof (screenshot?) of payment being made by card, not by gift voucher. Re-scan the receipts at a higher resolution, they are quite difficult to read and there does seem to be something wrong with that missing figure.

2) Amazon receipt. We need to clarify why the totals seem wrong. Why not show us a screenshot from Amazon too, will take you a couple of minutes to do. You need to explain this gift voucher too. Otherwise you’ve done quite well on this one.

3) Argos receipts. You had two receipts. At most these would have needed four separate images for you to be able to fit them on the scanner. You had to do this in order to be able to manipulate them in photoshop! Publish the full receipts, hiding only any actual card numbers. We need to see you didn’t use vouchers for this purchase. We need to see what the total order came to as well, just in case you got some kind of discount. Stop hiding things Duncan. It makes you look shiftier than ever.

4) Potential lies. Don’t say you can’t re-scan the receipts – you’ve not posted them yet. You were still scanning them in just before lunch today, and so you can still scan them again.

5) Do this tonight – you told your readers earlier that you would be sat monitoring Kop Talk all night tonight, so it’s not like you’ve got a night out with the missus planned or anything.

6) Totals – reinstate all of those deleted threads – we need to see that the amounts you claim to have collected match what was spent. Did you really put some of your own money towards the appeal? Did that £10 voucher you said you’d ordered from Argos ever arrive?

7) Lauren – start getting some proof together about where her money went. We’re talking about thousands of pounds of missing money in that case aren’t we?

And anyone reading this – please check these figures for me!

It’s a pity that an apology, if indeed I do need to make one, will now have to wait until the New Year.

Happy New Year everyone!

Newcastle fan gets his Crouch story wrong. Again.

Earlier today I bought a copy of the Liverpool Echo and had a good read of an article which gave a totally different interpretation of the leaked document Mihir Bose had claimed to have seen earlier this week. He wrote a complete doom and gloom article about the DIC investment deal, but it didn’t come as a surprise really. I’ve read a few of his “stories” in the past, and my bullshit detector twitches like crazy. As he is someone who’s written books on Manchester United, probably one of their supporters too, I wouldn’t expect him to write anything positive about LFC, and I’ve seen many completely incorrect stories of his about LFC’s investment prospects over the last couple of years.

In fact Bose is now joining the BBC, where he’ll be stable mates with the despicable Kelvin MacKenzie, possibly the most well known bullshit spreader when it comes to Liverpool FC. I hope they’re happy together, and I’ll be watching out for more lies, but hoping I don’t see any. When it comes to spreading bullshit about LFC there’s nobody does it more regularly than Duncan Oldham of course.

The Echo article spoke about how DIC would be giving Rafa Benitez transfer funds, contrary to what Bose was claiming in his swansong article for the Telegraph. It also explained what the document really said about selling the stadium in seven years – it was part of a list of options in a business plan, not an actual intention. Anyone reading it as being a definite plan to sell the club and/or the stadium in seven years is either very naive or a shit-stirrer.

Further inside the paper is the pink “Football Echo” section. I’ve not read it all yet (it’s always good for a chuckle to read the bits by the blue journalists) but I’ve read the bit on Peter Crouch. It was written by Chris Bascombe, and included quotes from Rafa Benitez saying that Crouch wasn’t going anywhere.

Common sense tells you this. Why the hell would Liverpool sell one of the three strikers they have been using this season without first bringing in a replacement? Most games Liverpool will start with two of the three on the pitch, and depending on how the game goes will bring the other one on at some point. If we’ve got two games in close succession one of the two who starts on the weekend game will be on the bench for the midweek game. If Robbie Fowler gets his fitness back he should start getting involved more too, but Rafa’s not going to be relying on that at the moment. And just to underline this a little more for the slower fat people, we lost one of our strikers to injury during today’s match, hopefully he’ll be fit for the New Year’s Day game, but we can’t be sure.

Also today (on one of the forums) I saw mention that in the printed version of two broadsheets there were articles talking about how Peter Crouch’s agent was responsible for trying to stir things up with the media. Crouch’s agent is also Ashley Cole’s agent in case you didn’t know, so he hardly has a reputation most of us would be proud of. Google for “tapping up”, “Chelsea”, “Ashley Cole” for more on that. The two broadsheets in question did not carry this story on their websites – either an accidental ommission or perhaps a demand had been made by the agent not to carry the story. The same forum carried a comment later from the owner of the forum, someone who has contacts at the club (he’s got Jamie Carragher’s mobile number for example), saying that Crouch’s agent had indeed been stirring things up. He also spoke about how Crouch was still as down to earth and genuine as he’d always been. Crouch may have been having some troubles on the pitch recently, and the vultures who looked daft for calling him when he first joined have been circling in wait, but he’s not been trying to leave the club at all. He wants to stay, Rafa wants him to stay, only shit-stirring agenda-driven people with no love for LFC would claim otherwise.

Which brings us onto Dunk – Duncan Oldham, Koptalk owner and all-round Konman.

One of his members, “seanrogers100” did him a service. He gave Koptalk’s readers the nearest thing to exclusive insider information they’ve had in months. None of the members who had any slight insider information or contacts still post on Koptalk, long since gone from a site so repulsive to genuine Reds and decent people once they know the truth. Dunk has no contacts himself, not even a gateman (as he sometimes claims) and certainly not Rick Parry as he also used to claim until we proved how much that was complete nonsense. Sean might know all about Dunk’s anti-Red ways, and about Dunk’s hatred of people who have real contacts at the club, and so could have been posting the Echo articles as a way of getting up Dunk’s nose. I hope so, but it’s also possible he was just trying to be helpful to his fellow (few) Koptalk members. Whatever it was, fat Dunk didn’t like it. Picture the scene as Dunk spits pie in twenty directions at mention of one of his arch-enemies (the articles from Saturday’s Echo don’t go on the net, meaning fat Dunk can’t rip them off and use them as his own. He’s only got access to the Newcastle equivalent)…

#60898 – minutes seconds ago
bascombe on crouch
seanrogers100 seanrogers100
Gold Member
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Registered: 16/03/06
Posts: 321
for a few of you who i know dont get access to the football echo on a saturday.

in the football echo today chris passed on some comments which have probably been said off the record by rafa – i actually agree with them and have been saying them for a while:

he basically said – “since crouch came back from the world cup he seems to be entirely focussed on goals but is not getting the performances he did when he was on his goal drought and last season. Rafa backed him to the hilt when he was playing well but more importantly working hard and it is clear his application this season has not been what it was. Rafa quotes” he knows that i supported him last year when he missed chances because of his all round performances. I will continue to back him”

Now i agree with chris/rafa/both as i noticed mainly at homne to portsmouth this year how annonymous he was. Think back to that chavski game in the cl at anfield last year. he was awesome all round the pitch. Almost unplayable. This season he has scored some good goals but taking them away when was the last time you saw him play really well?

I want to keep him and chris makes the point that rafa has been trying to tell crouch that he does not need to move to progress his carear which suggests the stroies are coming from newcastle/his agent/or both.

there is no chance of him being sold this season but i think rafa is losing a little faith in him. We bought him due to his performances away from home and this year in 11 starts away from home he has only started three times.

Next games he plays wlets hopoe he plays well outside the box as well as in it!!!

come on the crouch!

Edited by seanrogers100 ( minutes seconds ago)
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#60901 – minutes seconds ago
Re: bascombe on crouch [Re: seanrogers100]
Kop_5 Kop_5
Honorary Member
***

Registered: 11/06/04
Posts: 13725
Thanx for that sean,if crouch is still at liverpool next season i would be very surprised
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#60904 – minutes seconds ago
Re: bascombe on crouch [Re: Kop_5]
JD JD Moderator
Moderator
***

Registered: 12/12/04
Posts: 13043
Loc: Cambridgeshire
Crouch will be hear next season.
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So far so good. Kop_5 – it’s time you stopped helping Dunk out by being one of his few non-moderating posters. He’s hardly got any posters on his site who aren’t either admins (i.e. family) or mods (i.e. people who should know better, like Rich Tea and JD).

Now for the real fun. As we said, picture fat Dunk’s pie getting spat at his computer screen, picture the can of cider falling to the shed floor. How dare someone post Chris Bascombe’s real insider knowledge on his site.

Dunk doesn’t do insider news. He does bullshit – and how well he does it….

#60908 – minutes seconds ago
Re: bascombe on crouch [Re: seanrogers100]
Dunk Dunk Administrator
KopTalk.com
****

Registered: 20/08/04
Posts: 13942
Crouch is available. Newcastle have offered £7million, Liverpool turned it down. Word was put out that £12m was what LFC had told Newcastle, this was leaked to the media to tempt people to come in a little lower thinking they’re getting a bargain. He’s definitely up for sale if someone comes in. If we say he’s for sale then potential buyers will lower the price. Newcastle, Villa, Pompey etc all want him.

Oh dear Dunk. This is worse than your bullshit about Noel White. (For anyone new to the blog, Oldham claimed Noel White wasn’t the board member quoted by the Mirror slagging off Rafael Benitez. Even though many other sources and informed LFC websites were saying otherwise. And even when David Moores forced White to resign Oldham tried to make out it was still someone else who’d gone to the Mirror. Dunk is that stupid!) So Dunk, who told you this then? Earlier in the day you were using a clip you’d stolen from Sky of Phil Thompson talking about Crouch. Thommo is a former Red. A former coach. He works for Sky. He talks about what he thinks he knows. Is he going to betray a confidence on national TV? He’ll only do it once, because next time he’ll not have anyone’s confidence!

Duncan – you looked an idiot with your Noel White lies, now you look an idiot with your Crouch lies. You want him out, and if your voice had any kind of influence you’d be trying hard to get him out. Maybe you’re still trying hard, but you’ve no credibility. You’ve got a few members left who maybe still fall for your crap, but that’s all. You can’t get rid of Crouch – you’ve not got the power. Like you never had that tape of him talking to the S*n in the summer.

I think one of the funniest bits of the bullshit is “Newcastle, Villa, Pompey etc all want him” – who’s “etc” then? Come on – you can’t actually use “etc” in this kind of story! Who else wants him?

Newcastle may well have been sounded out by the agent, but Dunk you’d not know that. You may be a season ticket holder and fan of Newcastle, but you’ve no contacts there either. You’re not actually a Geordie, you’re someone who was drummed out of Scarborough, probably frightened to death of who you might bump into round there. And the Geordie’s don’t like being compared to a piece of scum like you. They’re actually decent people in the main, even Ant and Dec aren’t all that bad!

I also enjoyed this next bit of vintage Duncan, posted in response to someone pointing out that Kuyt hadn’t scored for a bit. Perhaps hinting that Kuyt was as likely as Crouch to be sold, seeing as both were Rafa’s own signings, both were playing quite well without scoring:

#60916 – minutes seconds ago
Re: bascombe on crouch [Re: Rborhara]
Dunk Dunk Administrator
KopTalk.com
****
Registered: 20/08/04
Posts: 13942
Kuyt has been a bit iffy recently which is a shame but we all know that it takes time to settle, plus his old man is seriously ill which is a distraction. I’m sure he’ll come good.

Dunk tries hard to make his bullshit fit any facts people throw at him – and he bans anyone that really makes him look a dickhead. Which could explain why Kop_5 and JD post replies as if they actually believe Dunk – they don’t want to be banned. I hope it’s that, rather than them actually being so gullible as to believe Dunk really does have knowledge from inside the club! How gullible can anyone be to actually believe Dunk knows more than Chris Bascombe? Chris is a qualified journalist who went to Uni to study journalism and actually gets to speak to Rafa Benitez just about every day of the week, and other players and officials from the club at very regular intervals. Dunk is a lazy Konman who left school without any qualifications and got kicked out of the army (probably for being lazy) before setting off on his career to rip anyone off he could. The closes he gets to Melwood is to stand on a bin looking over the wall. He no longer has his season ticket for Anfield so doesn’t even get inside Anfield that way any more.

Sean was less worried about being banned, pointing out that Dunk was completely wrong with his bullshit statement. Either he’s not bothered about being banned, or doesn’t realise that he soon will be. Never question anything said by Dunk or one of his aliases. NEVER…

#60917 – minutes seconds ago Re: bascombe on crouch [Re: Rborhara]
seanrogers100 seanrogers100
Gold Member
**
Registered: 16/03/06
Posts: 321
bascombe stated at times last year that lfc will not evolve until crouuch is our plan B and not our plan A. Whether you agree with him or not it appears that rafa thinks the same way.

I just feel that players of his type are very difficult to get hold of and are vital in english football. Would you sign him for la liga? Of course not but here is different.

He will get better with age as he has no pace anyway and i see no reason why he would want to leave.

I hear what you are saying Dunk but bascombe not only used rafa’s quote in the paper but also in his own words said crouch will be going nowhere unless rafa’s mind changes in the summer.

Bascombe normally leaves an issue silent rather than end up with egg on his face e.g. were we to sell crouch in jan i will be sending him an email asking why he printed stuff today!!

No chance of him going in January in my opinion.
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#60918 – minutes seconds ago Re: bascombe on crouch [Re: Kop_5]
JD JD Moderator
Moderator
***
Registered: 12/12/04
Posts: 13043
Loc: Cambridgeshire
Originally Posted By: Kop_5
even if we get Big bucks to spend in the summer ?

well every player has their price mate.

Just seems to me that rafa certainly is good at realising if he aint happy with a player he has bought. However, Crouch aint done nothing wrong in my opinion. You need 4 strikers and Fowler aint upto much so think its being hasty to say the least.
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#60925 – minutes seconds ago Re: bascombe on crouch [Re: JD]
Kop_5 Kop_5
Honorary Member
***
Registered: 11/06/04
Posts: 13725
no imo crouch hasn’t done anything wrong to be sold but maybe he has been showing his discontent and maybe rafa is growing impatient with him and if we get money to spend can we do better than crouch,i wonder how jon carew would do for us
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#60930 – 57 minutes 35 seconds ago Re: bascombe on crouch [Re: Kop_5]
JD JD Moderator
Moderator
***

Registered: 12/12/04
Posts: 13049
Loc: Cambridgeshire
Crouch hasnt done anything wrong. I think its just a case if Rafa is going to get alot more money he wants better quality. However, I hope he doesnt make the mistake of selling him and not having someone else lined up. He did that with Owen and mucked up by not replacing him at all.
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JD, Kop_5 – Dunk is a know-nothing fat conman. Stop believing him over people like Bascombe. And if either of you donated to the Koptalk Alder Hey appeal, are you glad your money paid for Dunk’s Christmas booze order? He’s STILL not shown a single receipt, or a single screenshot, as he promised he would, from the Alder Hey purchases.

Why not? What is he hiding? How much profit did he make from it? It only takes a few minutes to scan some receipts in after all.

What do Koptalk's headlines lead to?

Just to keep to the “promise” of trying to make sure you can judge for yourselves whether Koptalk’s “insider” bullshit is worth paying £30 for, here’s the latest. Note the headline designed to attract attention too. It’s about Lucas Neill, the player who the whole world knew nearly became a Red last summer.

Try not to laugh at “Koptalk understands” or the way he sounds oh-so-knowledgeable about the way contracts work. Having never kept to one himself, implied contract or actual legal document, it’s no wonder he doesn’t really understand the concept: “…permission would need to be obtained which usually means that a fee would have to be agreed first. That though is up to Rovers.” Usually? A fee has to be agreed or he stays. If the fee is actually a zero fee then that is still the agreed fee to get the player to leave. Dopey.

#59420 – Today at 12:12 PM
Liverpool swoop imminent
KOPTALK.COM KOPTALK.COM Administrator
Team Member
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Registered: 28/07/03
Posts: 26916

Liverpool will make a formal approach to Blackburn Rovers within the next few days for Lucas Neill.

KOPTALK understands that Neill’s agent Peter Harrison made contact with Reds chief executive Rick Parry yesterday (Wednesday) to arrange a formal date to discuss a possible transfer as part of the formalities.

The player does not need permission from Rovers to discuss a possible summer transfer as he’d be out of contract by then so he’s free to negotiate a pre-contract from January 1st.

However, as Liverpool want to sign Neill next month, permission would need to be obtained which usually means that a fee would have to be agreed first. That though is up to Rovers.

Rovers are still seeking £1.5million for the player but they would take Stevie Warnock in a direct swap deal. That though is unlikely and we’d also be surprised if we paid anywhere near £1.5m for the player.

Liverpool are in the stronger position but the key to the deal will be the amount of pressure that the player puts on Rovers to leave. If he fails to force Rovers to release him, the player knows that come the summer, Rafa would have other options.

Paddy Dominguez, who works for Neill’s management company, has confirmed that Liverpool are still in for Neill. He also claims that Barcelon and several other clubs are chasing his client.

Dominguez said: “Liverpool remain very much in the frame but they are by no means the only team to have shown a strong interest.

“Lucas has made very clear his decision to move on and people will know what the destination is early in the New Year.

“Lucas has been a fantastic servant to Blackburn over the past five years, but he now has an opportunity to realise his dream of playing at a top European club.

“In addition to Liverpool and Barcelona, several other big clubs are interested, so we’ll just wait and see.”

Meanwhile, the fat conman who seems to have made himself a profit from his Alder Hey appeal, reported this story…

#59403 – Today at 11:58 AM Gerrard hospital scare confirmed
KOPTALK.COM KOPTALK.COM Administrator
Team Member
***

Registered: 28/07/03
Posts: 26916 It’s been confirmed that Steven Gerrard’s daughter Lexie was taken to Alder Hey hospital on Christmas Eve due to a mystery health scare.

The 8-month old baby was rushed to hospital following a sudden increase in her temperature and was kept in overnight for observation.

Lexie was rushed to hospital a couple of months ago in a meningitis scare but that turned out to be a suspected allergy.

Rumours of the hospital visit had been doing the rounds but until it was confirmed, we thought it best to leave this off the site.

Let’s hope little Lexie returns to full health soon.

Alder Hey. Yes, the hospital which treated Steven Gerrard’s youngest is the same hospital Dunk seems to have skimmed some money from. The scumbag must be so proud.

And as for “rumours” doing the rounds? More likely that Oldham read the story as it appeared on news sites this morning. As usual though the persistent liar had to invent a bit to the story, hoping his members would think he was in the loop over such things. Also as usual, the persistent bullshitter with the goldfish memory had forgotten how he’d told us in the past he kept in contact with Steven Gerrard on a regular basis. I can’t remember if that was before or after he told us the name “Duncan Oldham” wasn’t his real one, which of course would have made the wedding menus from his wedding to his estranged wife and deeds on his home all fake too. Pillock.

He read the following story in the Echo, but has to put a headline on designed to get some attention….

#59490 – minutes seconds ago
Reds duo attracting interest
KOPTALK.COM KOPTALK.COM Administrator
Team Member
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Registered: 28/07/03
Posts: 26916

Liverpool have received an informal enquiry regarding the availability of Gabriel Paletta and Salif Diao.

Spanish La Liga outfit Gimnàstic de Tarragona have approached Rafa Benitez about the possibility of signing both players on loan in the near future.

Diao’s loan spell with Stoke expires in a few days time and believe it or not, he’s been playing some decent football at that level and it’s likely that they will try and secure his services.

Paletta is in need of some experience if he is to succeed in England so a loan move to another English club would make sense. However Rafa could be tempted to loan him out to Gimnàstic for the second half of the season.

Also new to Koptalk today, from the site with all of its claims of insider contacts, is the story that hit the rest of the net yesterday. But they didn’t have Dunk’s “knowledge” added in. Dunk found out about this from his copy of the Mirror, I can only assume his copy of the S*n didn’t have any LFC stories in it…

#59331 – Today at 10:24 AM £14million Alonso
KOPTALK.COM KOPTALK.COM Administrator
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Registered: 28/07/03
Posts: 26916

Further reports today claim that Atletico Madrid are prepared to offer Liverpool £14million for midfielder Xabi Alonso.

Alonso has been identified as their top target of 2007 with Atletico sporting director Jesus Garcia Pitarch boasting that they have a good chance of signing the player.

It’s obvious that the Atletico interest is genuine but the player isn’t for sale. £14million though would certainly make the boss think but Xabi is one of Rafa’s favourites and providing D.I.C. come in, the boss doesn’t need to sell.

Finally, for now at least, is this request from one of Dunk’s few remaining gullibles. Assuming it’s one of his gullibles and not someone reeling Dunk in, again. Also assuming that this prolific poster (18 posts) isn’t actually Dunk trying to force some activity out of the last few members…

#59193 – Yesterday at 11:11 PM podcasts
kevin_d kevin_d
Gold Member
Registered: 13/03/06
Posts: 18
hi lads whats the score with the podcasts these days are we still doing them ? or shall i send my new shiny ipod back.

#59194 – Yesterday at 11:12 PM Re: podcasts [Re: kevin_d]
Dunk Dunk Administrator
KopTalk.com
****
Registered: 20/08/04
Posts: 13872
Would you like us to do one for ya? We have every intention of carrying on so yeh, we can come back if we’re wanted

#59202 – Yesterday at 11:19 PM Re: podcasts [Re: Dunk]
kevin_d kevin_d
Gold Member
Registered: 13/03/06
Posts: 18

how about a koptalk review of the year a bit like the bbc 1 but more cheap and cheerful ?

#59204 – Yesterday at 11:22 PM Re: podcasts [Re: kevin_d]
Dunk Dunk Administrator
KopTalk.com
****

Registered: 20/08/04
Posts: 13872

What happened this year?

#59207 – Yesterday at 11:29 PM Re: podcasts [Re: Dunk]
kevin_d kevin_d
Gold Member
Registered: 13/03/06
Posts: 18
point taken

#59208 – Yesterday at 11:30 PM Re: podcasts [Re: kevin_d]
Dunk Dunk Administrator
KopTalk.com
****
Registered: 20/08/04
Posts: 13872
lol nah I just can’t remember much other than the FA Cup final 🙂

#59442 – Today at 12:35 PM Re: podcasts [Re: Dunk]
irishgeo irishgeo
Gold Member
***

Registered: 10/07/03
Posts: 1503
Loc: Ireland

how about some podcast koptalk awards.

#59465 – Today at 01:19 PM Re: podcasts [Re: irishgeo]
southafricanred southafricanred
Gold Member
**

Registered: 13/08/06
Posts: 723
Loc: South Africa Yeah come on dunk for new years please do a podcast where you and steve hand out your koptalk awards. It will be mint..

#59469 – Today at 01:26 PM Re: podcasts [Re: irishgeo]
Dunk Dunk Administrator
KopTalk.com
****
Registered: 20/08/04
Posts: 13872

Most annoying member? Best reject of the year? Best pie award?

I’d like to hear your suggestions for categories for this blog. Most prolific liar? Most original kamikaze post? Funniest kamikaze post? Dunk’s most outrageous lie, most despicable lie, funniest lie, far-fetched lie (etc). Dunk’s funniest way of showing the blog doesn’t bother him at all honest. Any other categories, but best of all some nominations. I don’t think I’ll be able to do it as a vote, but you never know…

DUNK: Where are those receipts for Alder Hey?

"Liverpool" site's £20m defender claim not what you'd think

Wondering who Liverpool’s £20m defender is? If you read Koptalk’s latest misleading headline then you’d probably be thinking that Liverpool boss Rafa Benitez had put that price onto one of our players. But no, it’s a price tag on someone else’s player, and the headline was designed to attract hits from people who think the word “Kop” in a website title means it’s a Liverpool website. In reality the “KopTalk” website is run by a former Leeds United fan who currently owns a Newcastle United season ticket and gets most of his transfer exclusives from the S*n or the Newcastle Evening Chronicle. The rest he makes up or steals from other LFC sites, without any acknowledgement, even claiming he’s got his own contacts inside the club!

#58301 – Yesterday at 01:56 PM
£20million price tag slapped on defender
KOPTALK.COM KOPTALK.COM Administrator
Team Member
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Registered: 28/07/03
Posts: 26886

Clubs interested in recruiting Micah Richards will have to stump up £20million, so say his club Manchester City.

The teenage right-back who can also play in the centre of defence, has seen his valuation rocket following serious interest from Chelsea and that’s bad news for the likes of ourselves, Arsenal and Spurs who are all keen on signing him.

Manchester United are also keen on the youngster but Sir Alex has reportedly been told that funds will be there to compete with Chelsea if the Old Trafford boss wants to push ahead with a formal offer.

Expect more of the same from Koptalk next month – the transfer windows are  the busiest times of year for Koptalk, the times of year where they can make up more and more misleading headlines in an attempt to Kon people into parting with £30 for “insider” news.

Koptalk have no contacts at the club at any level. That includes gatemen, who aren’t going to be so easily bribed by the fat Konman. (In the summer, Oldham claimed to have persuaded a gateman, through the gateman’s brother, to become the latest member of the payroll for Koptalk. He of course hadn’t spoken to any gateman’s brother, and of course has no payroll of insiders and informers to add the gateman too. On the same day he claimed he’d got the painters at Anfield ringing him up with the identities of everyone who arrived at Anfield – he was at Melwood at the time. He also claimed he was set to move into Chris Waddle’s £300,000 home overlooking Melwood. Yes, that Chris Waddle. The Geordie one who’s never played for any of the Merseyside teams.)

As well as making up transfer stories to get people to part with £30, Dunk has spent a good amount of the last few years selling fake “signed” merchandise, and launching dubious “charity” appeals. Earlier this year he was combining the two, selling footballs with the most laughable of fake signatures on them for £100, similarly fake shirts for over £200, FA Cup final tickets (not fakes) for £1600 a pair – all supposedly for the benefit of his disabled cousin Lauren. Lauren never saw more than a token amount of what was collected at the beginning. Tens of thousands of pounds had been taken from Liverpool fans by the Koptalk Konman. Even now, in full knowledge of the accusations we’ve made, Oldham hasn’t yet confirmed that any of the money found its way to Lauren. Send him an email at support@koptalk.com and ask him what happened to the money. He’ll tell you to ask Lauren!

Just as we got closer to Christmas he launched an appeal for Alder Hey. Surely he couldn’t be about to rip people off again, not in full view of this blog with its thousands of daily visitors. We were worried about him asking for all donations to be paid straight into the Koptalk paypal account instead of him setting something separate up. At the same time I hoped this was finally a sign that he wanted to put things right, start offering something back from all his past cons and thefts.

After failing to show any receipts, after hiding the evidence of who’d donated what and how much it came to, after hiding his list of what he’d claimed to spend his money on, the whole lot was deleted from his forum. No mention of it, no sign of it, and I reported this in my last post on here.

But then I thought I’d got it wrong, I thought I’d missed the latest home of the Koptalk Alder Hey Appeal.

This appeal had first appeared as a sub-forum of its own, under the “Executive Lounge’ bit of the tumbleweed-infested Koptalk members’ site.

Then it moved to be a sub-forum of its own, this time under the “Chill Out Room” section of the same very quiet website.

All along there’d be different, important, threads related to the appeal disappearing on Dunk’s whims. Threads that showed evidence of how the money had come in. Members would leave a message saying how much they had pledged, “Katie” would list each pledge, then when it was received would show how much came through after the Pay Pal charges had gone out. Those threads were deleted as soon as it got close to the time to add it all up.

Later the forum was deleted altogether, and Dunk put just the threads he wanted his readers to see, and put them in various places throughout his site.

As we got closer to Christmas the only thread left for his members to see showed an email from Alder Hey and some photos from the “Imagine Appeal” offices at Alder Hey. More importantly was a promise that the receipts from the purchases would be scanned in and put onto the site, “over Christmas”. The fact that these receipts were, according to previous promises by Dunk, supposed to have been handed straight to Alder Hey “for guarantee purposes” at the same time as the goods were handed over was just another example of how Dunk continually goes back on his word without explanation.

On Christmas Eve all references to the appeal were removed, as far as I could tell.

The idiot running Koptalk, Duncan Oldham, had spent a week pretending to be in New York, when he was clearly still in Wallsend. Yet he couldn’t be arsed to spend five minutes scanning in those receipts to prove how he’d done all of this above board for the first time in his Internet life.

This morning I looked at the site and spotted this…

More hiding by the Konman

So the forum is almost certainly still there, just hidden from members.

What are you hiding Duncan?

No receipts as Alder Hey Konman hopes we'll forget

Right, that’s the Christmas Day truce over with, now it’s time for the Boxing Day let-him-off-fairly-lightly phase. I’m still hopeful that the owner of Koptalk will finally see some sense and hold his hands up instead of making up wilder and even more ubelievable lies.

What’s Dunk the Konman been up to this past few days? How has the Koptalk owner and anti-Red been spending Christmas Day and the build-up?

First of all, he’s decided to remove all evidence of his Alder Hey appeal from his site. The sticky threads about the appeal have gone in light of some criticism here. A notice late last week said that the receipts would (finally) go on show at Koptalk “over Christmas”, but that notice has now gone. Imagine how much more positive the publicity would be if Dunk could spend just five minutes shoving the four or five receipts onto a scanner before uploading the images onto his site. All that proof of how he’d gone to Argos and spent cash (not vouchers) on the goods. Also the added proof from screenshots of how he’d used cash (not vouchers) at Amazon, and the other site he used for buying stuff.

He collected £2000 from his site members, yet he’s still not been able to show us any evidence that he actually paid the amount he’d claimed. He’s not been able to show us a receipt from Argos dated after the start of his appeal – is that because he bought the goods at trade prices? Is it because the telly was one of his own old ones? Or was it even knocked off? I can come up with a long list of reasons as to why he won’t (or can’t) show us a single receipt for the two grand spent, but none of them are what I’d call good reasons. Dunk can’t come up with any reasons, not one at all.

So apart from making himself look even more dodgy than ever, what else has Dunk been up to this past few days?

Last week he realised that his pathetic and needless “I’m in New York sewing up a property deal” was causing him some problems. Thick Dunk had been posting away happily on the Friday, watching the CL draw from his shed at 11.30am, and posting at occasional intervals including some on his “FAO Smoove” thread – the one where he made out he was on his way into New York as he typed. It was crap even by his standards, but early evening UK time saw him post as “Dunk” for the last time for a few days. He’d told his drooling visitors (and a couple who knew he was bullshitting and helped him look an even bigger fool by feeding him some bait) that he was going to be out of the country for 9 days. That meant he’d not be home until Sunday, Christmas Eve.

For some reason he decided that “Dunk” had to stop posting on the Friday night. Laughable really. In his little fantasy world he had the funds, not to mention access to technology that is as yet unreleased to anyone else in the world (including Bill Gates) to make posts on his crappy forum from the skies above the Atlantic. Yet, when he got to New York he couldn’t get onto his forums at all. His fantasy idol Smoove had arranged through his brother for Dunk to become a New York real estate investor, yet Smoove couldn’t provide him 10 minutes on Firefox or IE to log into his forums. His fantasy US cellphone didn’t stretch to internet access, his PDA or laptop lost its fantasy wi-fi capablilites in New York. The renowned glutton wasn’t able to make use of a single internet cafe. He was there for nine days yet wasn’t even able to log on for 1 minute. And considering he’d bought this house to move into himself, under his fanstastic plan of leaving the running of Koptalk to his 17-year-old stepbrother, it’s hard to believe he couldn’t access the net at all for a week, even if you are gullilbe to fall for the rest. Every time he has one of his fantasy “brain”waves he makes himself look more stupid than ever before. Pillock.

The nine days was soon cut short, but not before he’d created another new alias. His play on “Geordie” had us all laughing – no, it did – as he came up with a username of “Jordy”. Out of the blue this new member had suddenly started posting, with an uncanny ability to sound exactly like the fat owner of the least-loved “LFC” website out there. As always Dunk’s “Jordy” idea was one he realised later on, after coming out of his panicky trance, he should have avoided using. Not as bad as his fairytale of New York, but still a crappy fantasy. No sooner had he invented “Jordy” had he killed him off.

If Dunk had a budget for his fantasies he’d employ a continuity assistant. These are the people in the film and TV world who make sure that mistakes in make up and clothing don’t creep into the show. Say an actor gets his face ripped off by a fat conman in one scene, well his wounds have to be consistent throughout the rest of the film or programme. Scenes shown five minutes apart in the final production are sometimes shot five months apart – so the continuity expert makes sure that when it all gets put together the wounds are the same size and in the same place.

With a continuity assistant Dunk’s inability to count would be less of a problem for his fantasies. His poor memory of what he posts in one of his afternoons of insanity would not kick him in the arse later. He was back from his nine-day fantasy excursion to buy his new home in New York after seven days – either because he forgot he’d said nine days or because he’d forgotten how to count to nine.

Maybe he’s got a new continuity assistant lined up – he reckons he’s “employing” yet another members of “staff” soon – he was delighted to reveal this to his most gullible side-kick, the one with a crush on Katie…


#58092 – Today at 03:07 PM Richt
Dunk Dunk Administrator
KopTalk.com
****
Registered: 20/08/04
Posts: 13771
Hey Rich… we have a new girl starting on the forums this week… you’ll be like a dog on heat trust me

Dunk reads this blog, but I haven’t got the heart to explain about the differences between dogs and bitches and what “on heat” actually means. Last week he thought he was about to become a Dad again, but he’d forgotten his wife left him ages ago and the only women he’s been near are his myspace girls. And again, those were just a figment of his bullshitter’s imagination. He’s probably heard the story of the nativity and mixing that tale up with his other fantasies decided it’s quite normal for fat men who live with their mothers and don’t leave the house to be able to become dads without having a partner.

His continuity assistant might also remind him of how he wanted to end Peter Crouch’s career last summer by exposing him for talking exclusively to the S*n, flying in the face of the boycott of that rag by the Reds of the world. He told us he had a tape of Crouch talking to that particular publication. He told us he’d use it to end Crouch’s Anfield career when he felt like it. Then he snapped out of his fantasy world and remembered there was no such tape. He’d made it all up again, in another attempt to defend himself for using the S*n to make stories, hits and money.

Now he’s hoping those members left behind on his site don’t realise how vindictive he was prepared to be…

#58093 – Today at 03:12 PM Peter Crouch
Dunk Dunk Administrator
KopTalk.com
****

Registered: 20/08/04
Posts: 13771 Would you be happy to see Peter Crouch leave for £7million? I know I wouldn’t.

I was gutted when we signed him because I thought it was a joke that we shelled out £1million less than what we received for Owen on him. But I tell you what, I’ve eaten my hat!

He might not be the most graceful of players but there’s no hiding the stats. I feel a bit gutted for him with him losing his place but Bellamy and Kuyt would be my chosen strikeforce. Saying that though, I’d like to see him figure more given chance.

I don’t know what it is but sometimes he never looks like scoring yet he appears at just the right moment to slot one home.

I don’t believe the media reports that suggest Rafa is considering him. Admittedly EVERYONE has a price but Crouch isn’t a player I’d want to see leave.

This expert on football shows his ignorance of how transfer fees work based on how much of a player’s contract is still to run. No wonder his made-up transfer rumours are so hard to believe.

He also spoke on Christmas Day about what he’d got for Christmas. A box set of James Bond DVDs and a saxaphone. No doubt he’s hoping to use the 007 films to help him find out some new spying techniques for his wheelie-bin assisted Melwood trips. As for the saxaphone, he wants us now to all believe that as well has being fluent in (I think) four languages, he’s also a musician! I’m not saying he’s easy to see straight through (well I am, because he is) but he posted about how John Aldridge was on Sky singing Ring of Fire, then shortly afterwards, when another “act” on the Sky “Y Factor” show had been accompanied by a sax he was claiming he’d got one for Christmas.

In fact he spent Christmas alone – well, with his mam, but not with his kids. They’d had a couple of days with him earlier in the week but were spending the big day with their mum, Dunk’s estranged wife. And if you believe Dunk, even Steve wasn’t nearby for Christmas…

#57861 – Yesterday at 05:12 PM FAO DUNK
Kop_5 Kop_5
Honorary Member
***

Registered: 11/06/04
Posts: 13503
Will the ball rating system be coming back ?Also when you click on your user name it has ‘send a pm’in the list will they be coming back or is that their just to tease us?
– – – – – – – – – – – – –
#58071 – Today at 01:30 PM Re: FAO DUNK [Re: Kop_5]
Dunk Dunk Administrator
KopTalk.com
****
Registered: 20/08/04
Posts: 13771

It’s up to Steve really. I’ll mention it to him.

Kop5 – Dunk’s not going to bring back the PM facility, because he knows that word would spread to those members still unaware that there is a blog exposing Dunk as an anti-Red, and that all the missing names they’ve been unable to find have now gone to other sites. And Steve won’t get a say in it, because the dictatorial Dunk won’t allow him a say in it.

It also looks like he’s dropped the free SMS service too. Some members say that was the only thing they really got out of the Gold Club, especially overseas members, but even that was never reliable. Nowhere near everyone entitled to them would get them as Dunk did his best to keep the costs down. Complaints started appearing again recently, members wondering where their messages had got to. Dunk’s almost certainly run out of credit again, and without the means to steal from his members in such a lucrative way he’s not got the money to get more credit. Rather than admit this, he blames it on the software.

Don’t forget, he’s got numerous PCs in the Koptalk offices (shed) and yet he has trouble installing the SMS software on more than on computer. If it doesn’t work on one PC, surely it can’t be that hard to try it one of the many others…

#57292 – 23/12/06 01:55 PM SMS TECHNICAL PROBLEM
KOPTALK.COM KOPTALK.COM Administrator
Team Member
***

Registered: 28/07/03
Posts: 26845
We are experiencing a problem trying to launch the software that sends out SMS alerts to our members. We have just made contact with the software providers and are waiting for them to call us back. As a result the team line-up may be delayed or not sent out at all today.

We hope to have the problem resolved within the next hour but we’ll update you either way by 3pm.

UPDATE: Still no response from the providers. We will continue chasing this up.

Edited by Dunk (23/12/06 07:31 PM)

I wouldn’t rely on getting any SMS updates today either – although if you complain he’ll try and send you one using his own phone so it’s probably worth a try just to make him spend his last few pennies.

I wouldn’t expect to see any Alder Hey receipts either. He’s not managed to steal the whole £2000, probably only making about £800 out of this, so it’s not as bad as the five-figure sum he stole from his Lauren charity appeal – but he still should have registered this appeal, like he should have registered the Lauren one. In the New Year we want to try and pursue this in more detail, so we still want to hear from you about what you donated and what you were told it was for.

The above was written on Boxing Day, then I got kind of sidetracked thanks to the temptations of Christmas booze and food, having to walk to the shop to buy the only batteries we didn’t already have thousands of in the house, playing games with the youngest, eating and drinking a bit more…

So I’ll carry on today, and there are still no Alder Hey receipts. And it’s not like I’ve missed them in an avalanche of posts from other members. All forums are quiet at this time of year, but Koptalk has probably NEVER been this quiet…

#58373 – Yesterday at 04:21 PM A pin drops
bolshyboy bolshyboy
Gold Member
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Registered: 15/08/04
Posts: 1578
Loc: On Top … and boy it sounds loud…

Anybody out there?
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#58381 – Yesterday at 04:23 PM Re: A pin drops [Re: bolshyboy]
Dunk Dunk Administrator
KopTalk.com
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Registered: 20/08/04
Posts: 13787 always
_________________________
Radio Merseyside interviewer to Bill Shankly: “Mr Shankly, why is it that your teams unbeaten run has suddenly ended?” Shankly: “Why don’t you go and jump in the lake?”

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#58409 – Yesterday at 04:40 PM Re: A pin drops [Re: Dunk]
bolshyboy bolshyboy
Gold Member
**

Registered: 15/08/04
Posts: 1578
Loc: On Top I know you’re always there!
People are a little quiet these days mate.
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#58481 – Yesterday at 05:27 PM Re: A pin drops [Re: bolshyboy]
Dunk Dunk Administrator
KopTalk.com
****

Registered: 20/08/04
Posts: 13787 Always is at Crimbo. People are on holiday, not at work, not at college etc. Wait until the window opens
_________________________
Radio Merseyside interviewer to Bill Shankly: “Mr Shankly, why is it that your teams unbeaten run has suddenly ended?” Shankly: “Why don’t you go and jump in the lake?”

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#58511 – Yesterday at 06:16 PM Re: A pin drops [Re: Dunk]
bolshyboy bolshyboy
Gold Member
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Registered: 15/08/04
Posts: 1578
Loc: On Top Xmas is no excuse
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#58534 – Yesterday at 06:57 PM Re: A pin drops [Re: bolshyboy]
Dunk Dunk Administrator
KopTalk.com
****

Registered: 20/08/04
Posts: 13787 Some people have lives lol
_________________________
Radio Merseyside interviewer to Bill Shankly: “Mr Shankly, why is it that your teams unbeaten run has suddenly ended?” Shankly: “Why don’t you go and jump in the lake?”

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#58536 – Yesterday at 06:58 PM Re: A pin drops [Re: Dunk]
bolshyboy bolshyboy
Gold Member
**

Registered: 15/08/04
Posts: 1578
Loc: On Top I’m an atheist. For some bizarre reason, the banks are closed. That’s why I’m here.

I don’t ask why….

Edited by bolshyboy (Yesterday at 06:59 PM)
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#58539 – Yesterday at 07:02 PM Re: A pin drops [Re: bolshyboy]
Naveed Naveed
Gold Member
**

Registered: 22/07/05
Posts: 1542
Loc: Bangalore I’m here for a chatter Bolsh!
_________________________
“How do wars start? Politicians tell lies to journalists and then believe what they read” – Karl Kraus (1874-1936)

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#58540 – Yesterday at 07:09 PM Re: A pin drops [Re: Naveed]
bolshyboy bolshyboy
Gold Member
**

Registered: 15/08/04
Posts: 1578
Loc: On Top Oh you….

I’m surprised seeing you here at xmas!

Why aren’t you at mass?
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#58541 – Yesterday at 07:10 PM Re: A pin drops [Re: bolshyboy]
Dunk Dunk Administrator
KopTalk.com
****

Registered: 20/08/04
Posts: 13787
_________________________
Radio Merseyside interviewer to Bill Shankly: “Mr Shankly, why is it that your teams unbeaten run has suddenly ended?” Shankly: “Why don’t you go and jump in the lake?”

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#58543 – Yesterday at 07:11 PM Re: A pin drops [Re: Dunk]
bolshyboy bolshyboy
Gold Member
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Registered: 15/08/04
Posts: 1578
Loc: On Top Jus’ kidding…

Must be Eid soon.. remind me when?
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#58545 – Yesterday at 07:16 PM Re: A pin drops [Re: bolshyboy]
Naveed Naveed
Gold Member
**

Registered: 22/07/05
Posts: 1542
Loc: Bangalore Yeah, 2nd Jan. Hope to see you in the Mosque
_________________________
“How do wars start? Politicians tell lies to journalists and then believe what they read” – Karl Kraus (1874-1936)

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#58548 – Yesterday at 07:21 PM Re: A pin drops [Re: Naveed]
bolshyboy bolshyboy
Gold Member
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Registered: 15/08/04
Posts: 1578
Loc: On Top And please remind me what happens then?

I remember the streets of Rusholme being cordoned off for speeches and the like.

‘scuse my ignorance.
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#58552 – Yesterday at 07:28 PM Re: A pin drops [Re: bolshyboy]
Naveed Naveed
Gold Member
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Registered: 22/07/05
Posts: 1542
Loc: Bangalore
Originally Posted By: bolshyboy
And please remind me what happens then?

I remember the streets of Rusholme being cordoned off for speeches and the like.

‘scuse my ignorance.

It’s just our new year mate. The speeches? Oh’ those are just a call for the Holy war
_________________________
“How do wars start? Politicians tell lies to journalists and then believe what they read” – Karl Kraus (1874-1936)

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#58554 – Yesterday at 07:33 PM Re: A pin drops [Re: Naveed]
bolshyboy bolshyboy
Gold Member
**

Registered: 15/08/04
Posts: 1578
Loc: On Top I guess they’ve changed a little.

It’s funny, I don’t remember the Sikhs and Hindus doing the same thing…

Nevermind. Happy new christian year to you and yours..and a happy Eid to you as well.

…..[oops] me I must be getting old. 😉
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#58731 – 40 minutes 18 seconds ago Re: A pin drops [Re: bolshyboy]
DMHPioneer DMHPioneer
Gold Member
***

Registered: 08/05/06
Posts: 1255
Loc: Hull
Originally Posted By: bolshyboy
… and boy it sounds loud…

Anybody out there?

KRYTEN: Listen! Can anyone hear anything?

Pause. There is silence.

CAT: No.
KRYTEN: Precisely. No one can hear anything! And you know WHY we can’t
hear anything?
RIMMER: Why?
KRYTEN: (In the Voice Of Doom) Because there are NO sounds to hear.

Red Dwarf Series 4, Episode #4: WHITE HOLE

Got the whoe box set for Christmas
_________________________
Brick Top: Do you know what “nemesis” means? A righteous infliction of retribution manifested by an appropriate agent. Personified in this case by an ‘orrible cnut. ME!

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#58734 – 31 minutes 57 seconds ago Re: A pin drops [Re: DMHPioneer]
Katie Katie Administrator
KopTalk.com
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Registered: 11/07/06
Posts: 1240
Loc: UK Oh dear …. does that mean we are now going to hear Red Dwarf quotes until next christmas???
_________________________
If you require support, please call Steve on +44 (0) 7962 367 537 between 7am and midnight, 7 days-a-week. Alternatively you can open a support ticket online by following this link –>>

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#58742 – 27 seconds ago Re: A pin drops [Re: Katie]
DMHPioneer DMHPioneer
Gold Member
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Registered: 08/05/06
Posts: 1255
Loc: Hull
Originally Posted By: Katie
Oh dear …. does that mean we are now going to hear Red Dwarf quotes until next christmas???

Not at all SMEG HEAD

I mean after all I dont want you all thinkin im some kind of geek like Dwayne Dibley

Dunk – get off that fat arse of yours and get those receipts scanned in. OR ARE WE RIGHT? ARE YOU HIDING SOMETHING?

The Fairytale of Newcastle

Dunk’s great idea to pretend he’s in New York buying property when he’s really in Newcastle hiding from one form of inspector or other has given me some inspiration. With deepest and most sincere apologies to the Pogues and Kirsty (RIP), here’s the official Insider Insider Blog Christmas song…

humbug.gifA fairytale of Newcastle

It was Christmas Eve late
When fat Dunk sank
Another Woodpecker
then had another one

And then he sang a song
“The Blaydon Races” one
He put his pie away
And dreamed Newcastle won

He put his Toon shirt on,
Found his beloved S*n,
He started looking
For stories he could use
So near to Christmas
He’d got no contacts
And it was nearly time
To make up transfer news

He sat all day on his arse
For his club that was gold
All the so called exclusives
Were false or were old
When he first takes your cash
Even on Christmas Eve
The stories he’ll give you
are bullshit you’ll see

He’s a conman
and a liar
He loves Kieron Dyer
He stole from his cousin
And then stole some more,
He also likes swinging,
And myspace birds minging
Sits pissed in a corner
And makes up some shite

He needed vouchers swapping for cash, so he took it from Alder Hey
And used it to bet on snow, for Christmas day

He’s a bum
He is scum
He’s known best as fat Dunk
Lying all day and night on his site full of shite
The scumbag, the bastard
Spends half his life plastered
Happy Christmas you arse
Let’s hope it’s Koptalk’s last

He needed vouchers swapping for cash, so he took it from Alder Hey
And used it to bet on snow, for Christmas day

Slimy DuncanHe lied to everyone
He didn’t know anyone
He hated LFC
He told us nothing true
His contacts were all fake
His crap jokes make us groan
He now lives all alone
Not even got Koptalk Zoo

He needed vouchers swapping for cash, so he took it from Alder Hey
And used it to bet on snow, for Christmas day

(You’ll be glad to know there aren’t any plans to make this a regular feature. And before anyone writes in, I know Wallsend isn’t technically in Newcastle,  but it’s close enough).