A taste of what’s to come – how Duncan Oldham humiliated himself on KopTalk over the Maxi Rodriguez transfer

As we prepare ourselves for another summer of laughing at the bullshit Duncan Oldham craps out on KopTalk, I thought it would be useful to look back at his record during the last transfer window.

Say what you like about Oldham, but at least he’s consistent – the January window saw him maintaining his 100% failure rate. That takes some doing.

There was only one major Liverpool transfer story – Maxi Rodriguez – and he couldn’t even get that right…

On New Year’s Eve, one of the many free LFC sites with genuine “insider” sources revealed that a deal to sign Maxi Rodriguez had already been agreed. This is the article that appeared on the Liverpool site Well Red on December 31st:

Thursday, 31 December 2009
EXCLUSIVE: Maxi Rodriguez on his way to LIVERPOOL FC
RAFA BENITEZ has agreed to sign long-term target Maxi Rodriguez from Atletico Madrid, according to sources inside Liverpool FC.
The Reds boss was linked with a swoop for the winger back in 2008 but has now secured a deal to bring him to Anfield on a short-term loan with a view to a permanent transfer.

The following day, both the Daily Mail and The Times ran articles saying that we were in for the player.

A day later, KopTalk eventually caught up:

02/01/10 01:23 AM Liverpool swoop for Maxi Rodriguez
KopTalk Team
Liverpool representatives are in Spain trying to negotiate a deal to bring in Maxi Rodriguez.
The 29-year-old Atletico Madrid winger is out of contract in the summer and is currently looking for a new club after announcing his decision to move on.
Atletico paid Espanyol €7million for him back in 2005 but these days he tends to be out of favour.
A move in January would increase his chances of a place in Diego Maradona’s World Cup squad and Rafa Benitez is hoping to bring him in on loan until the summer.
According to reports, Rafa may have to move someone on first to reduce the wage bill to allow the transfer to be given the green light.

It became apparent over the following days that it was a matter of when, not if, Maxi would sign. On January 6th, the Daily Mail stated that “Atletico Madrid’s Maxi Rodriguez is expected to agree terms with Liverpool over the next 24 hours.

So Oldham decided to take a calculated risk and dusted off not one but two of his “insider” aliases. First up was “The Informer”:

07/01/10 09:33 AM Maxi Rodriguez medical
The_Informer
Maxi Rodriguez will have his medical either today before 8 p.m. or first thing tomorrow morning.

Business as usual for Oldham, then – repeating what had already been reported in the national press and adding in his usual “either/or” nonsense. In truth, the player would not complete his medical until January 13th, which made Dunk look a little foolish, but nowhere near as stupid as his next piece of “insider” info:

07/01/10 11:38 AM One deal done; One nearing completion…
wallet
Hi guys
I’ve just been told that one transfer has been completed (terms agreed and pending medical) and another is nearing completion. Both are incoming. It came via text so that’s all I have for now – which I know isn’t very helpful.
I assume the first is Maxi.
I’ll update when I get it.
Wallet

which Oldham followed up six days later with:

13/01/10 11:35 AM Re: One deal done; One nearing completion… [Re: wallet]
wallet
Hi
I just got an update on my post of last week. Deal 1 – Maxi to be rubber stamped today. Deal 2 – Won’t name for obvious reasons is all but done (personal terms agreed). I can’t and won’t say more at the minute but both deals are considered real value for money from withing the club.
Wallet

and again on the with:

25/01/10 11:42 AM Re: Any more transfers? [Re: kiwi]
The_Informer
Originally Posted By: kiwi: “Can any of our insiders tell us if we are going to sign anyone else or is that it for this Jan?

Yes we will.

There was no “Deal 2”, of course. Liverpool would make no other signings during this transfer window. Yet again, Oldham had shown himself to be a liar. He still found time to bring a little more humiliation on himself, though:

25/01/10 07:38 AM Any more transfers?
kiwi
Can any of our insiders tell us if we are going to sign anyone else or is that it for this Jan?

25/01/10 11:42 AM Re: Any more transfers? [Re: kiwi]
The_Informer
Yes we will.

Oh dear.

Also in the January transfer window:

KopTalkers learn about the sale of one of our most promising youngsters, Christopher Buchtmann, to Fulham from a member who has read the news on The Liverpool Way forum:

31/01/10 09:50 PM Buchtmann sold for 100k ? whats going on ?
mfinch7172
Very highly-rated German Under 18 left-sided fullback and midfielder Christopher Buchtmann has apparently been snapped up by Fulham.
Buchtmann was left out of yesterday’s 1 – 0 Academy victory over Manchester United. Malcolm Elias (former head of our academy and the man who brought a number of players including Buchtmann) has managed to snap up the German for 100,000 pounds.
Buchtmann apparently had his medical this morning.
All this info courtesy of the lads from The Liverpool Way (who usually know a lot about the ongoings at the Academy).
Furthermore, it looks as if there’s further disarray at the Academy as all the Under 10 and Under 11 coaches have been sacked and yet to be replaced.
Adam Pepper looks set to move on as well once he finds a club. Everton and Wigan are both keen.

On December 31st, The Mirror ran a story headlined “Liverpool weighing up bid for Greek right back as cover for Glen Johnson”. 26 – yes, 26 – days later, Oldham managed to crap out this:

25/01/10 12:33 PM Rafa looking for cover for Johnson
Dunk
Editor
Rafa’s looking for some cover for the right-back position. He hasn’t got long left now. Any ideas? Do we need to bring in cover for Johnson or should we be able to survive with what we have?

That’s what £36-odd per year buys you on KopTalk.

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Posted in Duncan Oldham, Koptalk - Lies, The Insider. Comments Off on A taste of what’s to come – how Duncan Oldham humiliated himself on KopTalk over the Maxi Rodriguez transfer
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