KopTalk's latest offer – pay £30 to read three words

Just as we predicted at the weekend, Duncan Oldham has begun churning out his bullshit again in a desperate effort to drum up business.

He certainly needs to take drastic action. Here’s a comment made by a disgruntled member of his free forums yesterday:

11/05/07 10:44 AM Re: Is anyone out there? [Re: Dunk]
I was under the impression that I could converse with other posters and not just the editor and his staff.

The only entertainment to be had on the free site is from trying to spot Oldham’s aliases talking to themselves.

Right on cue, Oldham crapped out one of his long, rambling, unintentionally amusing editorials. It was essentially a rehash of Chris Bascombe’s NotW article from the previous day. Much of it was pompous, tedious and didn’t make any sense. But we don’t care about that. What does concern us is that Oldham is having some his recurring fantasies again – that he socialises with Liverpool players, has contacts within the corridors of power at Anfield and regularly attends LFC training sessions.

Here are a few slices of prime KopTalk bullshit:

“You see I don’t believe that the boss wanted to sell Craig Bellamy for example. Many of you will say that the player’s attitude and personality forced him out, well I don’t believe this based on observing training sessions in the run up to his exit and by also socialising with him and other members of the squad.”

Oldham, the closest you have ever come to having any sort of relationship to Craig Bellamy was when you told malicious lies about him being involved in a bust-up at Melwood in the run-up to a Merseyside derby. Just what the team needed before one of the most important matches of the season. Your lies were sufficiently damaging to the club for Chris Bascombe have to set the record straight in the Echo a few days later.

You’ve lied for years about socialising with LFC players. But when you went to Melwood last year, you didn’t pop inside for a chat with your dear friends in the squad. No, instead you made a complete fool of yourself by standing outside the gates with a bunch of kids. When the players and coaching staff drove past, they clearly had no idea who you were. And how do we know this? Because you’re so extraordinarily thick that you videoed the whole sorry episode and broadcasted it to the world.

And stop pretending you attend Liverpool training sessions. You now live in LA NUCIA – ALICANTE, more than 1,000 miles away from Melwood. Click here for more details of how we know he’s based in Spain.

The closest you come to Liverpool training sessions these days is deciding every few weeks to pay the Press Association for their images of them. See this article for proof of how Duncan Oldham tries to pass PA’s images off as his own, to con people into thinking he has access to the players.

“When I stood in Tom Hicks office in Dallas earlier this year I picked up things that I haven’t really talked about because I know if I do I’ll be shot down. The Big Cheese don’t impress me, I don’t see them as figures of fame, I’d rather talk to a complete stranger from the Kop about their love for Liverpool FC than someone stood in a suit who wants to convince you that making money isn’t their priority.

“Tom made it very clear to me that ownership for him wasn’t about throwing cheques around left, right and centre. That makes sense, I actually like that stance but you still have to write serious cheques to get the best. He told me that the future was about buying youngsters before they had made the grade. The minute he said that I pulled him up and said that we, the fans, appreciated that but that we’re at a stage on the LFC timeline that needs proven experience now, not tomorrow.

”I’m still fully behind the manager but people higher up the chain assure me his position isn’t as safe as some people think.”

Oldham, you spent – at most – ten minutes in Hicks’ company. You are not his confidant – his first words when he met you were: “What’s your name?”. You’ve never had any meaningful contact with anybody in a position of power at the club. When you began fantasising about Rick Parry demanding a meeting with you last year, the club informed us that: “Koptalk do not attend any of our press conferences, nor do they have any access to Rick Parry. They certainly have not come to any arrangement with Mr Parry.”

When an unidentified LFC director caused a media storm with his comments to a Mirror journalist last year, you made a complete arse of yourself by claiming the executive in question was definitely not Noel White. As we all now know, White admitted soon after to making the comments and resigned.

And after years of lying about having the inside track on the investment saga, when the two most important investment stories broke, KopTalk members learned about them not from yourself, but from members who had heard the reports on other LFC forums and NewsNow.
Worse still, your members weren’t even allowed to read many of these stories as you’ve banned links to other LFC sites – because you’re terrified that your members will realise they can get what they pay for on KopTalk free of charge on countless other Liverpool sites.

Finally, here are the stories behind the latest KopTalk front page headlines. Or the ones Oldham had actually bothered to write, at least.

“Boss considering bid” is so top secret that it doesn’t even exist – there isn’t a story of that name anywhere on KopTalk. We can’t help but feel that £30 is a tad steep for three words.

“Besiktas – WATCH ONLINE – FREE” led, as his streams adverts always do, to the free myp2p website – which anybody can access without paying Oldham a penny.

In fairness to Oldham, he did for once have the decency to name his source in one report – but you would only have discovered that after you had shelled out £30, of course:

“Reds Closing In On 4 Players”

—leads to—

04/11/07 10:29 PM Liverpool closing in on 4 players
KopTalk Team Administrator
Newspaper reports claim that Liverpool are closing in on the signing of four promising youngsters.
The highly-respected Oliver Kay (The Times) reports that the boss and Piet Hamberg are working on deals to sign 15-year-old striker John Cofie from Burnley and 16-year-old Finnish midfielder Lauri Dalla Valle.
Two more from from Holland and Germany are also tipped to be brought in during the January transfer window.


“More transfer speculation (named)”

—leads to—

06/11/07 11:52 AM More transfer speculation
KopTalk Team Administrator
Liverpool boss Rafa Benitez has again been linked with Sunderland’s Kenwyne Jones.
Various newspapers have today picked up on rumours of us making a firm enquiry regarding the player’s availability.
The 6ft 5in Trinidad and Tobago international is definitely under consideration by the boss who is looking for a replacement for Peter Crouch.

as reported on NewsNow by The Mirror, LFC Online, The Telegraph, Tribal Football, The Soccer Blog and others

13 Responses to “KopTalk's latest offer – pay £30 to read three words”

  1. Trichin Cap-O'Bese Says:


    Is that his place? MURILLO,43, La Nucia, (ALICANTE)

  2. Koptalk Outsider Says:

    04/11/07 10:29 PM Liverpool closing in on 4 players
    KopTalk Team Administrator
    Newspaper reports claim that Liverpool are closing in on the signing of four promising youngsters.
    The highly-respected Oliver Kay (The Times) reports that the boss and Piet Hamberg are working on deals to sign 15-year-old striker John Cofie from Burnley and 16-year-old Finnish midfielder Lauri Dalla Valle.
    Two more from from Holland and Germany are also tipped to be brought in during the January transfer window.

    He didn’t even get it right. The Times reported that Liverpol are chasing 5 players, not 4.

    I read this story several days before though

  3. Koptalk Outsider Says:

    Not sure, Trichin, if that’s the right place. Something doesn’t look right.

  4. outsideinsider Says:

    Here are the latest KopTalk headlines:

    TRANSFER: Agreement reached/Transfer agreed

    —leads to—

    08/11/07 03:35 PM Liverpool secure transfer
    KopTalk Team Administrator
    Reports originating from Finland claim that Liverpool have secured the services of 16-year-old Finnish midfielder Lauri Dalla Valle.
    As previously reported by KOPTALK (4th Nov), this kid along with 15-year-old striker John Cofie and two others are tipped to arrive in the New Year.

    This was reported on News Now four hours earlier by A Liverpool Thing. Their report contains the following sentence: “Story spotted on the RAWK forum.” Other LFC forums also carried the news this morning.
    Oldham’s “As previously reported by KOPTALK” refers to this…

    Reds Closing In On 4 Players

    —leads to—

    04/11/07 10:29 PM Liverpool closing in on 4 players
    KopTalk Team Administrator
    Newspaper reports claim that Liverpool are closing in on the signing of four promising youngsters.
    The highly-respected Oliver Kay (The Times) reports that the boss and Piet Hamberg are working on deals to sign 15-year-old striker John Cofie from Burnley and 16-year-old Finnish midfielder Lauri Dalla Valle.
    Two more from from Holland and Germany are also tipped to be brought in during the January transfer window.

    So Oldham is boasting about having repeated a report which thousands of others had already seen on NewsNow. And as someone else pointed out on here, Kay actually said Liverpool were closing in on five youngsters.


    The next headline leads to a story which one of Oldham’s members had copied and pasted from a Tribal Football report that appeared on NewsNow several hours earlier.

    Juventus transfer link/Juventus link latest

    —leads to—

    07/11/07 11:22 AM Liverpool linked with Juventus defender Jonathan Zebina.
    The Punisher
    Liverpool and Tottenham are being linked with Juventus defender Jonathan Zebina.
    Tuttosport says Zebina is set to be made available in January and a move to England is on for the France international.


    Agent wants Liverpool transfer talks

    —leads to—

    08/11/07 11:17 AM Danchev wants Liverpool talks
    KopTalk Team Administrator
    The agent of Spurs striker Dimitar Berbatov is trying to arrange a meeting with Liverpool FC agents in the hope of securing his client a move to Anfield.
    But it’s not just Liverpool that Emil Danchev is trying to make contact with. Manchester United is another club that is believed to have been offered Berbatov if you believe the latest reports.
    Berbatov though insists that he doesn’t want to leave Spurs and there’s nothing to suggest that Reds boss Rafa Benitez would be interested anyway.
    “There has been a lot of stuff written about me leaving,” said Berbatov. “I want to let everyone know that I am a Tottenham Hotspur player, I love the club and everyone at the club.”

    Oldham has, as so many times before, taken a report which is doing the rounds and added in his own bullshit.


    No transfer agreed – Reds warned off/Reds warned target won’t come cheap

    —leads to—

    07/11/07 07:21 AM No Liverpool transfer agreed as Reds warned off
    KopTalk Team Administrator
    Liverpool have been told that if they are serious about signing John Cofie that they will have to couch up some serious money.
    Burnley boss Steve Cotterill has laughed off suggestions that a £250,000 compensation fee is enough to land the highly-rated youngster who is also wanted by

    Arsenal and Manchester United.
    Cotterill said: “There’s been nothing agreed between us and Liverpool.
    “If they think they can nick him for £250,000 they’ve no chance.”
    Cofie was a VIP guest at Anfield for last week’s League Cup tie against Cardiff.

    As reported on NewsNow by Eat Sleep Sport, Club Call, Tribal Football, Pink Football and others

  5. outsideinsider Says:

    Boss wants to conclude £17million deal

    —leads to—

    09/11/07 02:59 PM Boss wants to conclude £17million deal
    KopTalk Team Administrator
    Liverpool boss Rafa Benitez says he wants to sign Javier Mascherano on a permanent deal.
    The influential midfielder wants to remain a Red and KOPTALK understands that the player’s agent held talks with Rick Parry within the last 10 days to lay

    down the terms of such a deal which must include a fee payable to MSI (transfer fee) and the player’s contract.
    It is believed that MSI are seeking around £17million for the player with Liverpol hoping to negotiate that down to the £14million mark.
    Speaking today, the boss said: “Mascherano wants to stay, he is very happy here.
    “He is a key player for us and I have been talking with him and he is really pleased to be at Liverpool.
    “His family are settled here and his wife is learning English and he is very comfortable here.
    “Javier also knows that the supporters like him and I think if everything is okay he will stay with us.
    “We are happy with him so it would be good for everyone if he stayed at Liverpool.”

    Oldham has added a little of his own bullshit to a report carried on NewsNow by the Echo, the offal, Shankly Gates, Sky Sports, Setanta, Vital Football, Tribal Football, Goal.com, Premiership Latest, Football UK, PremierLeague.com, ViewLondon.com,

  6. carras_boot Says:

    Think i just saw the fat fucker on Sky Sports.
    Seriously, if anyone has sky+, rewind it back to 5 minutes and I swear it looks like he’s at the North East derby today.

  7. carras_boot Says:

    He is sitting in the front row somewere with a red tie sitting next to a little boy who looks like his lad.

  8. irishgeo Says:

    not going to make the game at anfield then. thought he was going to make every game this season.

  9. Koptalk Outsider Says:

    Don’t think that’s him. He’s probably watching the match on TV in La Nucia.

    He’s made a couple of posts during the match.

    #77736 – November 10, 2007 14:55 Kenwyn Jones
    Dunk Dunk
    KopTalk VIP

    Registered: July 21, 2007
    Posts: 1949 Anyone watching him against Newcastle just now?

  10. irishgeo Says:

    come on.dont you think steve or katie knows his password

  11. outsideinsider Says:

    Another Sunday, another rehashed Bascombe NotW article (also reported on NewsNow by Tribal Football and Goal.com), with another generous helping of Oldham’s bullshit added to the mix. We’ll be commenting on Gillett’s alleged membership and on Oldham’s Dallas and Montreal trips in more detail later:

    11/11/07 08:53 AM Gillett and Hicks bust-up rocks Anfield
    KopTalk Team Administrator

    Liverpool FC’s new owners George Gillett and Tom Hicks have been involved in a bust-up over the way the club’s new stadium will be financed.

    It is claimed that Gillett is concerned that the club will be left with a debt of £500m despite making promises that this wouldn’t be the case when they came in. Hicks on the other hand is prepared to push through the high-risk refinancing plans. While Hicks has a reputation for not caring what people think, Gillett is seen as an honest and upfront guy, which is why he doesn’t want to be seen as going back on his word.

    Tensions between the duo is said to be at an all-time high with Gillett unhappy that he has been pushed aside despite initially coming in as the main partner. Both camps have now employed seperate accountancy firms and Anfield insiders fear that one of the two partners may have to go as it’s starting to look like they can’t work together.

    KOPTALK reported recently that former Liverpool chairman David Moores was demanding talks for explanations as to why verbal agreements would be broken, those talks haven’t been forthcoming as yet. Although powerless to do anything, Moores still feels responsible for the situation that is developing.

    Manager Rafael Benitez has expressed concerns several times in the past about the lack of communication from ‘above’ and he still remains unconvinced that the backing is there to make a huge difference in the transfer market.

    Hack Chris Bascombe runs a report in today’s News Of The World titled ‘Kop Owners In Split Fear’ which backs up everything we’ve been feeling for some months. No doubt it will be played down but with Bascombe now no longer having to toe-the-line in the local press, his new independent coverage working for one of the nationals could prove a real bonus to supporters.

    KOPTALK was the only Liverpool FC website in the world to be invited to Gillett’s and Hicks’ set-ups in Canada and America earlier this year when both men took over the club. We’ve spoken several times to both men and have communicated via email since getting a foot in the door – Gillett even joined this site as a paying member.

    We’ve kept our views on each party to ourselves although more recently we have dropped hints as to our real feelings. For now we’re keeping out of it to see what develops but if we have to put forward our own controversial views at a later day, then we’ll have no problem in doing so, if it turns out that the club has been had.

    Videos of our tour of Canada and the U.S. can of course still be viewed here –>>

  12. when will they learn Says:

    fuck me, hope dunk makes his point clear to hicks and gilette and lets them know in no uncertain terms that messing about will not be tolerated. I know he’s been holding back but the time has come for dunk to sort this mess out in the liverpool camp and get us back on track

  13. Steve O Says:

    “communicated via email since getting a foot in the door ”

    Like the cease and desist order served on them perhaps

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