by Rupert Insider
Yesterday, I noted Oldham’s odd remark about Steve MacNeish that “I treat him as a brother because that’s how I see him”. So I did some figuring.
Even if Oldham’s mother is now married to Andrew MacNeish or is his informal partner, neither of which Oldham has claimed, Steve is not Oldham’s half-brother or step-brother unless his mother was Steve’s biological mother 4 years before she was widowed by the death of Oldham’s father .
Oldham’s father was Robert Arthur Fred Oldham.
Duncan Oldham has many times publicly claimed his father committed suicide in 1993. He also claimed emotively that the death of his father widowed his mother.
Oldham was about 19 or 20 at the time.
In 1999, Oldham said his surname was “Wadkin” when he was a kid, because his parents had split up.
Given Oldham’s statement that his mother was widowed by his father’s death it suggests that she was still formerly married to him but may also have been in an informal partnership with a Wadkin, unless that partnership had broken up by 1993. (But see the postscript that suggests that Wadkin may have been his mother’s maiden name).
But why would Oldham change his surname to Wadkin when he was a kid, if he was still in a meaningful relationship with his father? And he may have been because he also claims that money he got when he was 20 as a result of his father’s death financed the purchase of his first luxury car.
Steven MacNeish was born in 1989. He was 4 when Oldham’s father died. Oldham says Steve’s father is Andrew MacNeish.
I am not aware of any statement by Oldham that his mother married him. Nor any statement that she is Steve’s biological mother. His name is not Wadkin.
Oldham says he lives across the street from his mother. But we have never seen any evidence that there is more than one house involved. All the evidence we have seen suggests that he lives with his mother.
So what is the relationship between the 32 year old Oldham and the 17 year old (just now turned 18) Steve MacNeish?
On the surface it seems to be an intense and exclusive friendship on both sides between the emotionally needy and insecure older man and the passive, undemonstrative youth whose main role is to act as a listener and approver.
Neither of them have other close friends. Oldham said yesterday that they both spend all their working hours together 7 days a week on KopTalk. He claimed this time last year that Steve slept in the KopTalk hut. Shortly after Steve began signing his name as “Steve Oldham” – at least for a time.
Oldham needs the relationship more than Steve. He admits Steve asks for nothing. But Oldham constantly harps on it, defines it, exaggerates it and tries to secure it with gifts – or at least the promise of gifts. He claims that he will take care of Steve and has already got him a place of his own and is supervising some courses for him. He said he has set him up for life. He said he will give Steve KopTalk and all related sites.
So how and where did it all begin?
Oldham said he moved from Scarborough, Yorkshire to his current address in Wallsend in March 2002. Steve was 12 then going on 13.
Yet Oldham said yesterday that Steve began working on KopTalk when he was 9 – and the archives show that Steve was put in charge of the KopTalk Kids feature when he was 10 in 1999. Is it possible that Oldham met Steve on the net? Obviously he was trying to encourage kids to join Koptalk by the very fact he had a specialist kids service – one now run by his 14 yr old daughter which also features his 8 year old son. And we know that some complainants state that he ripped off their young brothers for membership fees or sold items.
In 1999 when Steve started on KopTalk Oldham was 25. He had been married 1 year. In the previous two years 1998 and 1997 he had been advertising in Usenet groups for fit young lads and military cadets to join him (in the 1998 ad in which he disguised himself as a 25 yr old girl) or join him and his girlfriend in (in the first 1997 ad) . In both ads he invited them to perform in sex-videos he wanted to make with his cam. The first ad did not mention money the second did – it would cost the punter £10 or more.
As we all know, video cams have been a prominent part of his relationship with Steve for at least a year.
We don’t know when Oldham split from his wife. We do know that about a year ago, 2006, he complained that he did not have custody of his kids. Steve was 16 then, and “ran away” for a time.
It is extraordinary that thousands of people have been left with the impression that Steve is Oldham’s brother or half-brother. And until now, Oldham has never cared to deny it or clarify the situation.
Why would Oldham want to create that impression or allow it to grow? It seems it would have been so much simpler to have written a sentence explaining it or correcting false impressions. Its the normal, natural thing to do. After all its not as though he is shy about writing about his family and himself.
I suppose the obvious answer is that he wants people to have that impression. Why?
And after so long why did he feel the need to hint at a confession yesterday when Steve has reached an age when he has significant more legal rights.
When he says he treats Steve as a brother – that does not ring true either. Brothers don’t talk like that, they don’t act like that.
So what does Steve’s father have to say about it all?
Well, nothing now because Oldham has fixed Steve up with his own place. Oldham is Daddy now. But Andrew MacNeish has been featured on KopTalk before. Several years ago, when Oldham was first making friends with Steve, he gave Andrew a “KopTalk approved advertisment” on KopTalk – a whole page to advertise his get-rich-quick-pyramid- selling scheme. HERE
Andrew MacNeish put in another appearance early last year. Oldham said he was the person who put together the KopTalk hut and he was said to be the man featured in a staged photograph as one of the staff of KopTalk working on a computer. Oldham claimed that the hut was financed by his mother’s credit card. And Andrew is said to have appeared this year in the video of the Barcelona trip.
Oldham has created the mystery about his relationship with his friend Steve by his incomplete and apparently contradictory statements. Nobody asked for the statements. Most would prefer he kept his family life and his personal relationships to himself.
It seems to be part of his effort to turn KopTalk into a cult based on himself. He wants the members to see him as an all-knowing daddy – a benign dictator handing out treats. As we saw yesterday, he claims a relationship with Steve in which Oldham plays the role of generous, selfless patron to the equally selfless Steve – the two of them existing only to serve their KopTalk family. Was that supposed to be evidence of his credentials as the daddy of a cult and Steve’s credentials as his heir apparent and/or to divert attention from the realities of his relationship with Steve?
Whatever his real intentions – and I can think of several possibilities – he should not expect the public to accept a pig in a poke from him. If he wants to go public on any subject, the public has the right to respond.
It may be that readers will be able to fill in some of the blanks or explain some of the apparent contradictions . If so I will amend this post. Perhaps Oldham would like to take the opportunity we always give him to respond on these pages.
He won’t be able to ban questioners or commentators on here but will get a wider readership than on KopTalk.
1. Someone has written in to suggest he may have been called Wadkin if that was his mother’s maiden name and that she may have been so embittered towards his father that she required her son to change his name and Oldham would then have changed it back when he was older. Possible, I suppose, but no evidence for any of that. I do know he confirmed he was Wadkin when challenged on the net by someone who knew him by that name. It might be simpler if Oldham was not a person who claims to have changed his name by deed poll to Mr. Man Untd, or who operated an illegal business on the net as Del Johnson or who uses several different pseudonyms virtually every day in his fake “Insider” business on KopTalk.