by Rupert Insider
(5th June 2006) Steve MacNeish reached 18 today and Oldham congratulated himself on a job well done. He had taken a 9 year old boy into KopTalk and groomed him to become a dumber version of himself – a conman, liar and forger specialising in ripping of LFC and its fans.
I had taken to referring on the blog to Steve as his “alleged” step-brother. So I was not surprised when today in the middle of what Oldham intended to be a show- stopping torch song, he worked himself into a confession that he “treats him like a brother because that’s how I see him”.
This puts Steve’s running away last year when he was 16 in a new light as it does Oldham’s prostrating himself with grief, unable to continue with his business if the boy did not come back, then the bringing out the fatted calf when he did. He was to have unlimited porn on Koptalk’s computers at night as Oldham watched from his bed through a CCTV camera.
Then there was Steve signing himself as “Steve Oldham”. And, almost to seal their civil union, Oldham publicly promising to bequeath to him all his worldly goods – his tacky footy-and-porn empire.
The relationship intensified in the last year – there were those countless hours when the two were alone in the KT shed and cooped up together in all those frenetic car trips in the UK and the USA and La Manga and Barcelona and the shared rooms in cheap motels and the ever-present video camera lovingly focussed on Steve.
Then there was their joint dealings with “prozzies” – and I have a pretty good idea which one would watch there, too.
The truth is, Oldham has only Steve. And now he has given him “a place of his own” he can go around there where the two of them can be alone together out of sight of Steve’s parents.
What has all this got to do with us? Nothing!
But Oldham insists on ramming it down the throat of the only audience he has – passing strangers on the internet who, in good faith and blind hope paid membership in KopTalk because he claimed that it was for “mature” Reds and that it provided “official” LFC news and “insider” information. Its part of their indoctrination into the KopTalk cult. If they learn to accept that the sites is not about LFC but about “Daddy knows best” and the melodrama of his life in the hut, then he’s home and dry.
But you don’t have to be a cryptologist to see that his main target audience is us – the blog.
He uses Steve’s birthday to defend his own life and times and to claim again that he and his partner enjoy the publicity the blog gives them. The trick, he says, is to get people talking about you, it doesn’t matter what they say – its all positive – and the poor fools on the blog don’t understand that. (Which contradicts his claims that he decided not to publish his book because of all the negative publicity). And again he returns to his hurt that the blog mocks his treasured videos in that they show how crude and inept the two of them are. But they’re just playing a role, he claims, two good old boys having fun at the expense of those who paid £30. (Which is a pretty accurate description of his so-called video proof that he is Tom Hick’s confidant).
Note the hard-faced assumption that those he has ripped off on KopTalk will applaud how he has used their money to bestow travel and parties and gifts on his dumb boyfriend and that they will swallow his brazen claim that the idle, dishonest life the two of them lead can be classified not only as work but as 7 x 17 hours a day highly principled voluntary work without wages.
But Oldham does not want us to get so carried away by our admiration for MacNeish. He reminds us repeatedly that Steve is there to empty his piss pot, scratch his arse, fetch his grub and run interference.
He is also the fall-guy if anything should go wrong. Let him be the one who illegally touts the tickets from the shed in Wallsend and on the streets of Athens, let him be responsible for the double-dipping in members PayPal accounts, let him forge signatures on the fake memorabilia and writes the fake certificates of authenticity and mail them and let him be the Community Director and Editor (now “ex”) and general factotum who must answer enquiries from disgruntled members. And Oldham, like a latter-day Fagin lurking in the background, showers “well done my boy” every time he brings home a stolen silk hankie or fobs off an enquiry with a lie.
And if Steve ever should have to face the consequence of their joint frauds, Oldham already has grounds for mitigating circumstances. “The poor boy is stupid your honour, and easily led.”
All con artists reach the point when their past is a major impediment. Oldham arrived there in 1998 when his Del Johnson frauds were uncovered. So he ran away from that and adopted a new name and personality as a “a die-hard Liverpool fan”.
But that con began to struggle from its own bad reputation and like all con artists who are reluctant to give up a good thing, he looked around for a clean face to front his operations. That’s what Steve is supposed to be – the clean face. So when Oldham dare not show his own to LFC fans, or his KopTalk members, or cannot approach the media or the “big cheeses” whose attention he craves, he wires Steve up with a mobile, rehearses him in a script of lies and pushes him forward as the ice-breaker. He was right when he boasted that it helps that Steve is stupid. It also helps that Steve will do anything to preserve his supply of pornography, access to vehicles and an expense budget that allows him to swagger around airport restaurants ordering full English breakfasts.
I don’t wish Steve a happy birthday. I wish that he gets what’s coming to him for all his lying and thieving and his support for the Oldham cons. His age was never an excuse, but now he’s 18 he cannot appeal even to that.
But I will give him a gift – its a piece of advice. Go to the nearest Citizens Advice Bureau. Explain what’s been going on. Ask them to help you to get Oldham to cough up years of unpaid wages. Even if all you did was sit on your arse and watch porn – you were a kind of security guard and companion entitled to a minimum wage, plus time and a half for overtime and night duty and double time for weekends. If such a conversation will get you into trouble with the DSS refer them to Oldham’s claims that you are his dumb gofer. Tell them how he told you how to fiddle benefits. Offer to pay it all back in easy installments and then scarper! If you are hanging around Oldham to inherit his dirty sites forget it. He will drop them and move unto new cons and you will always be his dumb gofer.
Look what it’s done for you. You are 18 and already you have the reputation as a conman’s slag on the internet – a lying boozer. Pretty soon your new face will no longer be new and that’s when Oldham will look around for another. He already has his daughter and son lined up and who knows what the cat will drag in.
And that’s your future blown. Your role will always be that of a gofer to a greasy con man who will even go so far as to pretend you are his brother so he can use you.
And if you finish up in the gutter, he’ll write a country and western song about that, too.