More Bullshit from the Wallsend Bullshit Factory

While thousands of Liverpool fans await to hear news on the outcomes of the proposed investment meetings taking place this week to move along the new stadium project, a podgy fella from the North East has been pretending to be in the know.

As we all know, Duncan Oldham is nothing more than a con man, he is not in the know. He has no contacts at Liverpool FC, and anything he posts on his dire web site should be taken with a HUGE DOSE of salt. A pinch just isn’t enough where this bullshit merchant is involved.

Throughout this summer we’ve blown his cons and tricks into the public domain. Now more than ever people are aware of the lies. But now that we’ve forced him to close down his “free site” he has to make up more bullshit for his unsuspecting newbies, to keep up the impression that the fat boy from Wallsend is somehow in the know, and has contacts in and around the club.

He will beat on repeatedly that investment stuff bores the hell out of him. But he’ll still drill on about it regardless because it means money for him. And we all know that “money makes the fat Geordie round”.

Here’s some made up bullshit.

Posted by Dunk – #1651562 – 21/09/06 12:28 AM
“As soon as I heard the news about the 3 reported bids yesterday morning I made some calls.

The most important source is in a different time zone so I didn’t made contact until Wednesday evening. The problem is the country they are in made it virtually impossible to communicate by telephone (not USA, not far east).

I was in the car on my way to Anfield and the signal kept cutting out plus there was a massive delay. I said I’d retry after the match and I just have but sadly, no joy.

There is news to be had because the conversation started well. I will send a few emails and retry in the morning. I have no idea if it will be of interest. I can assure you I’m as keen as anyone here to see if we can get something on this, even though it’s a subject that does little for me.. “

Bullshit Oldham! You have no contacts, just a very vivid imagination and lots of desperation.  I can see the phone conversations now:

Dunk: “Hey its Oldham”
Other: “Who?”
Dunk: “Oldham. The fat guy from Koptalk”
Other: “You got the wrong number”
Dunk: “Please play along. My millions of users need some made up info.”
Other: “What are you talking about?”
Dunk: “The line is getting bad. I’ll call you back later.”

But wait, there’s more. This time Duncan puts on his ST3 cap on and pretends to be his ineloquent young step-brother Steve. We know its not Steve because firstly Steve has a very different writing style, and we know that Duncan speaks in 100% Bullshit. That’s his main language, followed by English some way behind.

Posted by ST3 – #1652809 – 22/09/06 11:05 AM
“Dunk asked me to post a quick message.

He spoke to a couple of people yesterday overseas regarding potential investment and they were not convinced that the club have any firm offers.

They believe that the headline and exclusive reports in the Liverpool Daily Post earlier this week were fed to them by the club to get something in the news.

While it is obvious that Steve Morgan is interested in investing, he hasn’t made a fresh bid, neither has L4. Overseas sources have told KOPTALK that there is a strong possibility that Bob Kraft has been in talks with the club.

Just after midnight Dunk received a call from a concierge friend at a top Liverpool hotel to get himself down there as there were some key figures of possible interest.

To cut a long story short Dunk was at the hotel until 4am talking to a couple of individuals who he had been introduced to. These guys were brokers from a major London based company. They are meeting Rick Parry this morning before heading to Leeds to meet officials connected to Leeds United (no idea why).

Although they are currently talking to Liverpool Football Club about investment the main man gave the impression that nothing would come of todays meeting.

Dunk has a massive hangover as he didn’t get to bed until 6am so he apologises for his no show this morning. He will be on later today. “

There you go. Another does of made up bullshit from Duncan Oldham. Straight from the Bullshit factory of Swan Avenue in Wallsend.

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26 Responses to “More Bullshit from the Wallsend Bullshit Factory”

  1. Ron Nasty Says:

    Not only is he lying for why on earth would someone talking about buying/investing in a club reveal all to a “fan” off the street, but what possible use it all?

  2. slightly disappointed Says:

    The second post could be the most obvious bullshit koptalk has ever posted. How did Dunk get from Wallsend to Liverpool and back within roughly 5 hours (as he left after midnight and was tucked up in bed by 6am), and without driving (as he got drunk and has a hangover)? The AA reckon it takes 3 hours to drive from Wallsend to Liverpool. And why would these serious brokers a) hang around the hotel bar until Dunk gets there and b) Stay out drinking until 4am when they are meeting Parry first thing this morning?

    None of that post adds up. None of it.

  3. sawyerinsider Says:

    another clasic example of madeup bullshit

  4. Alfonso Says:

    Firstly, does anybody actually believe he went to the Newcastle game in the first place?

    Even if he did, he would have left the ground after the match , be getting close to home just after midnight when his phone rings. He then turns around and heads straight back to Liverpool on the off chance of seeing a couple of brokers who are working an all nighter. He then leaves them gone 4am and gets back to bed at 6am.

    Utter nonsence. There is more holes in that story than there is in swiss cheese.

  5. sawyerinsider Says:

    Sounds like he dreamt it up as happening last night/this morning – even though he clearly wrote the post. Fatty is such a compulsive liar.

    Not to mention the holes that he had a call at midnight he would have had to have driven to Liverpool – getting there what 3am staying for 30 mins and heading home?

    Such nonsense.

  6. rupertinsider Says:

    He knows nothing about investment. Does he even know what a “broker” is?

    The only brokers involved are the club’s own brokers – they have an exclusive arrangment. It would be the club’s brokers who would prepare any written report and analysis of potential investments.

    They are bound to strict confidentiality by professional and contractual obligations. If they were to disclose their client’s business to anyone they might lose their licences and would almost certainly lose their client. The brokers conducting the search for investment are based in London.

    The idea that two members of their firm would be hanging around a hotel in Liverpool and would then spend the night talking to Oldham, the loudmouth ignoramous, is not only ludicrous it is also a symptom of his mental instability. He is cracking up!

    No self-respecting person would talk to Oldham about anything -certainly not about a subject he is not mentally capable of understanding.

  7. Tim Says:

    Got to laugh at the comment about the story the daily post did being something fed from the club to get in the news. Yet just a mere half a day later there is Chris Bascombe (the only local reporter who appears to have regular contact with the club) reports, after a chat with Rick Parry, that what the daily post reported was bullshit.

    Does anyone else get the feeling that the daily post is getting more and more like koptalk?

  8. rupertinsider Says:

    I think these consipracy “theories” of his come from the idiot in the USA who claimed to be in the know about L4. The guy who got him tickets to the premier of “Goal” in Newcastle and London. If you saw the photos he is a small time spiv about the same level as Oldham.

    It would not surprise me if that spiv somehow convinced the L4 people that KT was somehow representative of LFC fans as “the No. 1 site” and it would be a good idea to get them on board.

    And all that shows is that Jeffries and the L4 crowd knew nothing about LFC or its supporters and were just hustlers trying to push their film.

    Rationality was restored when the Kraft family ordered them to stop representing that Kraft were part of the L4 group (as Oldham had been parroting on their behalf).

    The Kraft family dealt directly with Parry.

    The L4 group- bunch of hustlers and spivs that they are – have no credidility and were knocked out of the loop and Oldham along with them. Even his spiv buddy did stopped answering his calls. So Oldham took to saying he was not interested in investment because “it does me ‘ead in”.

    Now that the rumours start up again and he has not got a clue what’s going on and cannot ask Parry or the club because they would never speak to him, he makes up ridiculous conspiracy theories.

  9. nossaro Says:

    Classic Duncan bollocks – it’s funny that he actually believes that people will fall that!!

  10. fat_boy_fat Says:

    AAAAHHHH its good to be back!
    Was getting a bit worried that Oldham book of “cock and bull” had ran dry!

    pppppfffff what a thicko i am to think that.

    A week or 2 without any massive lies and BOOM out comes one of his classic porkies! Its a lovely story isnt it. 2 top business blokes in a liverpool hotel having a quiet drink. Next some over weight ugly prick starts breathing in their ears and slobbering down his chin asking questions and getting answers. AS IF OLDHAM, AS IF!

    One thing Oldham, did you panick the other night when we beat Newcastle? and i dont mean for the reason that WE beat YOUR team. NO, i mean for the fact that after that lovely win your forums were DEAD!!!! No fucka there beside AF and that kop75 or whatever his name is.

    Go and see a doctor about them chest pains and tingiling feeling in your left arm.

  11. Chunky Says:

    Strange how Dunk has had no investment news for months then in response to the Daily Post suddenley everybody is calling him. Why are you never first Fatboy?

  12. rupertinsider Says:

    Above, I mentioned the hpoto of his “L4 contact”. You can see the photo here:

    dunkisalady

    I can pretty well lay-out how it happened.

    Let’s call his mate “Weasle-face”. Weasle- face reads on the net that Jeffries is trying to promote his film “Goal” by saying that he wants to takeover LFC. Weasel-face tries to figure out how he can make some money from this.

    He scans the net and finds “Official News from Liverpool Football Club from Koptalk the World’s No1 Supporter’s site and No. 1 LFC site.” He sends off an email to the editor that he is in the USA and has contact with Jeffries.

    Oldham falls for it hook-line-and-sinker (actually it doesn’t matter to him if is true or not as long as it seems plausible enough to generate a few hits). He writes back that he is, indeed the sole owner of the No.1 fan site, and has access to the board of directors, the top brass, ex players like Dalglish as well as huge influence over the supporters. Indeed his site is the voice of supporters. He would be willing to assist Jeffries – and would do it for the love of the club – especially if there was some well-paid role for himself once L4 took over.

    Weasel-face then contacts Jeffries for the first time and introduces hismelf as a partner of the editor of the No. 1 site etc etc etc. It could be crucial in generating fan support for the takeover, he claims.

    Jeffrey being quite distant from LFC is impressed. He then tells Weasle face that he is trying to put together a group and might even be able to get the Kraft family involved because he knows they are interested in LFC.

    Weasel face sends this information to Oldham to prove he really is in contact with Jeffrey and Oldahm milks it for all its worth.

    Meanwhile, LFC ignores all these goings-on and writes it off as yet another stunt by the oddball Oldham.

    Eventually, Kraft makes clear that he is not interested in being involved in Jeffrey’s bunch of shysters called the L4 group and that he has long-standing communications with Parry.

    Disappointed that he will not know become the Head of Press at LFC, but impressed by the number of hits this investment lark generated for himself, he now supports the bid of the soon-to-be-deposed and corrupt Prime Minsiter of Thailand, and Steve Moragn and any other dogsbody who seems plausible.

    All this time he is munching hot pies and slurping gravy as he is hunched over his computer, wheezing away in his Portakabin in Wallsend, more an outsider from LFC and Liverpool than ever, no chance of ever talking to or meeting with LFC’s officials, and reduced to sending his kid stepbrother to climb on wheelie bins to take photos outside Melwood as his site melts into oblivion.

  13. rupertinsider Says:

    Above, I mentioned the photo of his “L4 contact”. You can see the photo here:

    dunkisalady

    I can pretty well lay-out how it happened.

    Let’s call his mate “Weasle-face”. Weasle- face reads on the net that Jeffries is trying to promote his film “Goal” by saying that he wants to takeover LFC. Weasel-face tries to figure out how he can make some money from this.

    He scans the net and finds “Official News from Liverpool Football Club from Koptalk the World’s No1 Supporter’s site and No. 1 LFC site.” He sends off an email to the editor that he is in the USA and has contact with Jeffries.

    Oldham falls for it hook-line-and-sinker (actually it doesn’t matter to him if is true or not as long as it seems plausible enough to generate a few hits). He writes back that he is, indeed the sole owner of the No.1 fan site, and has access to the board of directors, the top brass, ex players like Dalglish as well as huge influence over the supporters. Indeed his site is the voice of supporters. He would be willing to assist Jeffries – and would do it for the love of the club – especially if there was some well-paid role for himself once L4 took over.

    Weasel-face then contacts Jeffries for the first time and introduces hismelf as a partner of the editor of the No. 1 site etc etc etc. It could be crucial in generating fan support for the takeover, he claims.

    Jeffrey being quite distant from LFC is impressed. He then tells Weasle face that he is trying to put together a group and might even be able to get the Kraft family involved because he knows they are interested in LFC.

    Weasel face sends this information to Oldham to prove he really is in contact with Jeffrey and Oldahm milks it for all its worth.

    Meanwhile, LFC ignores all these goings-on and writes it off as yet another stunt by the oddball Oldham.

    Eventually, Kraft makes clear that he is not interested in being involved in Jeffrey’s bunch of shysters called the L4 group and that he has long-standing communications with Parry.

    Disappointed that he will not know become the Head of Press at LFC, but impressed by the number of hits this investment lark generated for himself, he now supports the bid of the soon-to-be-deposed and corrupt Prime Minsiter of Thailand, and Steve Moragn and any other dogsbody who seems plausible.

    All this time he is munching hot pies and slurping gravy as he is hunched over his computer, wheezing away in his Portakabin in Wallsend, more an outsider from LFC and Liverpool than ever, no chance of ever talking to or meeting with LFC’s officials, and reduced to sending his kid stepbrother to climb on wheelie bins to take photos outside Melwood as his site melts into oblivion.

  14. rupertinsider Says:

    Above, I mentioned the photo of his “L4 contact”. You can see the photo here:

    dunkisalady

    I can pretty well lay-out how it happened.

    Let’s call his mate “Weasle-face”. Weasle- face reads on the net that Jeffries is trying to promote his film “Goal” by saying that he wants to takeover LFC. Weasel-face tries to figure out how he can make some money from this.

    He scans the net and finds “Official News from Liverpool Football Club from Koptalk the World’s No1 Supporter’s site and No. 1 LFC site.” He sends off an email to the editor that he is in the USA and has contact with Jeffries.

    Oldham falls for it hook-line-and-sinker (actually it doesn’t matter to him if is true or not as long as it seems plausible enough to generate a few hits). He writes back that he is, indeed the sole owner of the No.1 fan site, and has access to the board of directors, the top brass, ex players like Dalglish as well as huge influence over the supporters. Indeed his site is the voice of supporters. He would be willing to assist Jeffries – and would do it for the love of the club – especially if there was some well-paid role for himself once L4 took over.

    Weasel-face then contacts Jeffries for the first time and introduces hismelf as a partner of the editor of the No. 1 site etc etc etc. It could be crucial in generating fan support for the takeover, he claims.

    Jeffrey being quite distant from LFC is impressed. He then tells Weasle face that he is trying to put together a group and might even be able to get the Kraft family involved because he knows they are interested in LFC.

    Weasel face sends this information to Oldham to prove he really is in contact with Jeffrey and Oldahm milks it for all its worth.

    Meanwhile, LFC ignores all these goings-on and writes it off as yet another stunt by the oddball Oldham.

    Eventually, Kraft makes clear that he is not interested in being involved in Jeffrey’s bunch of shysters called the L4 group and that he has long-standing communications with Parry.

    Disappointed that he will not know become the Head of Press at LFC, but impressed by the number of hits this investment lark generated for himself, he now supports the bid of the soon-to-be-deposed and corrupt Prime Minister of Thailand, and Steve Moragn and any other dogsbody who seems plausible.

    All this time he is munching hot pies and slurping gravy, hunched over his computer, wheezing away in his Portakabin in Wallsend, more an outsider from LFC and Liverpool than ever, no chance of ever talking to or meeting with LFC’s officials, and reduced to sending his kid stepbrother to climb on wheelie bins to take photos outside Melwood as his site melts into oblivion.

  15. sawyer Says:

    actually rupert that photo is of Oldham with Happy Mondays star Bez at the Goal premiere.

  16. Ste Says:

    Mate – that’s Bez from the Happy Mondays.

    Unless I’m seeing a different photo.

  17. rupertinsider Says:

    My bad!

    He put that photo up to illustrate his report about his going to the premiere of “Goal” with the guy from the L4 group. So I assumed that’s who it was. (I did think it odd that he wore a horsey sports-jacket, but thought it so naff it might be what an American might buy, thinking it was typically English).

    I’ve no idea who Bez or Happy Monday’s is. In any case, if that’s him he fits the description of “weasel face”.

    Actually, I did hear an American guy on Oldham’s “radio” show who I thought at the time was the L4 guy. He was a mock gangsta rapper, full of obscenities and ignorant of the basics of football. When I mentioned it, others suggested that was Smoove. But I thought Smoove was someone he knows only from X-Box.

    Oldham should do a public service and put up a rogues gallery of who he says he knows from the L4 group, Smoovie, his mad hitter, and his other underworld friends so we can know who we’re dealing with.

    Its alway odd how he takes photos of everything and everyone except the people who he says give him inside information about LFC investment plans.

  18. what a whopper Says:

    One of his latest posts is a story of how how met Kuyt today and had a quiet word with him. he has even posted a picture of a signed shirt, the “To DUNK” looks completely different writing to the signature.

    Still some gullible members who believe him, sad.

  19. rupertinsider Says:

    Anyone can meet Kuyt and get a signature. Only Oldham would use it to attempt to prove that he has inside access to anfield, melwood and the academy and is a confidant of the directors and executives.

    He reminds me of the folk who buy labels featuring exotic palces and stick them on their luggage to fool people into thinking they have been there.

  20. what a whopper Says:

    The folks who put the stickers on their luggage don’t rip people off £30 a time though.

  21. rupertinsider Says:

    Here’s his Kuyt shirt Do you think Kuyt wrote the “To Dunk” part with his left foot or his right?

    THANKS TO ROCK: I saw your comment wuith the link to the photo in “comments awaiting moderation” – I’ve no idea why its there because this is not your first post, unless you used a new IP.

    There are six other commentaries there, too, but they have to be “unlocked” by Insider Insider and he seems to be out of the loop at the moment.

    One of the posters has written to me about his commentary. I hope you understand that if you are a first-time poster or using a new IP then your comment has to be cleared by Insider Insider.

  22. Yabba Says:

    A ‘genuine’ Dirk Kuyt’ autograph on the left of the image (white shirt)
    Fatty’s DK autograph on the right (Red shirt).

    They seem to be a little too different to be the same persons signature.

    MY guess is that a silly fat geordie con man wrote it himself.

  23. fat_boy_fat Says:

    From a post by dunk from his failing site

    DUNK – It’s always nice to get a heads up though. Makes you want to put more and more effort in all of the time

    It’s good money to the contributor but after expenses, I can assure you over the year we’re left with little, mainly because of the SMS costs – but as I always say, as long as we break even, anything else is a bonus i.e. pies

    Then someone says “you must be making a killing you fat twat with all these 30 quids”

    Dunk – It doesn’t work like that. We’ve spent £600 today on SMS credits alone, money that would be better in my pocket but we introduced the free SMS stuff for members and extended it. The outgoings we have are very, very high and people not in business or people who are a bit dim will just add numbers and x by £30.

    Fat loser!!!!!!!!!!! you are a fat thicko dick loser tit!

  24. rupertinsider Says:

    My apologies for the triple repetition of one of my posts above. It wasn’t me, wot did it .- hoenst! Today I have received many internal error message and timing outs from WordPress and can only assume that the triple postings were due to this.

  25. rupertinsider Says:

    fat_boy: It sounds like he is preparing the grounds for withdrawing his free SMS service or charging for it, as predicted on this blog the day he introduced it.

    He launched it when he thought he was flush with cash and members.

    His free services always become paid services.

    One thing I’ve noticed about Oldham’s grasp of accounting – he objects to paying money out.

    Even in the early days of his site, he never spent a bean on it – he got all his equipment free from “donators”.


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