Hi Dunk! Glad you're still reading.

liarliar1.jpgLooks like fat Duncan Oldham’s been reading the blog again. He’s now making this ludicrous claim relating to his rip-off SMS+ service –

KopTalk Editor
Posts: 2158
Offline     16-07-06 07:33 PM – Post#269107     New Reply
In response to bensuruncle

Around 300 people signed up in the first few hours, not bad for a Sunday. Looks like this will be another popular feature.

Glad he gave us an excuse to talk about it – we noticed before that it seems to actually offer less than his Gold Club version. He claims to give score updates with that service, but with his new one he only gives a full-time score. Seems a bit of a rip-off whichever way you look at it. (I now fully expect him to add this to his list of features for the new service in response to this blog. It doesn’t matter anyway – he’ll not be sending any SMSs out after a month).

As for his claims of “around 300” people signing up in the first few hours, seems a bit unlikely for so many reasons. For example, on his main, “free” site, he’s got this wonderful statistic –

Max Users Ever Online: 237

So, on his busiest ever day since he installed the software on his “koptalk .org” site he had 237 users logged in at one time at one point. That includes genuine users and any of our (and our supporters) aliases. It might include people who’ve since left. Whatever it includes, it’s the most he’s EVER had on this version of his forum.

As for activity today, between 13.15 and 20.00 he had 17 new topics created on his LFC forum, with 245 replies. He announced his new service at 14.15. Now that doesn’t suggest to me that there have been so many users online that 300 of them have decided to sign up to his new service.

So, Mr Oldham, proved to be a liar once again.

It’s becoming monotonous now, why not try telling the truth for a whole week, just for once in your life?


21 Responses to “Hi Dunk! Glad you're still reading.”

  1. Richard S Says:

    Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha……300 signups….Damn, I just shat my pants. I’d be surprised if Oldham had more than 10 people sign up for that service all year long. who would waste their money? I mean come on, give us a break Oldham.

    P.s Where is the proof of the Mortgage payments? I want to see the evidence from bank recipts, or you can expect a law suit coming your way.

  2. Tim Says:

    so that’s £12,000 for a year he’s looking at (if it is true and they all use the service for a year). That’s atleast £2,100 in VAT (of which he probably hasn’t invoiced) plus tax on profits or £1,274 income tax and £700 in NI (if taking it in as profits from trade for self employed person).

    Hope you are letting the taxman know about all this Dunk.

  3. kopwank Says:

    “Around 300 people signed up in the first few hours, not bad for a Sunday”

    300 people x £40 a year – so that’s £12,000 (yes £12k) that he has apparently earned today ALONE.

    Come on Dunc, you are either making these figures up or you are absolutely raking the money in – It can only be one or the other…

  4. kopwank Says:

    LOL Tim you beat me too it

    Seriously though this can be another open public question. If he really has taken £12k in a day I think he should stop moaning about how skint he is and start paying VAT/TAX and wages ASAP!

  5. kopwank Says:

    Does his forum software not list how many views there have been of each topic? PhpBB does this as standard, aswell as listing replies it gives impressions.

    If the impressions are a few hundred that proves he really doesn’t have that many visitors

  6. Chunky Says:

    Nearly as funny as the advanced sales for his book. Just numbers plucked out of the air.

  7. fat_boy_fat Says:

    Whats funny about these claims he makes is the fact he has NO Reciepts or accounts to prove this to be the case or not.
    So when the tax man finally catches up with him, the taxman will say, well MR Oldham you claimed to have had 300 in the first day, so that X amount you owe us.
    Duncan : well mr tax man i was only lying
    Taxman : ok prove it with your reciepts or accounts
    Duncan *grasps his chest and his left arm goes numb*

  8. insider's outsider Says:

    If you look at people viewing numbers on each forum, they are much lower than similar figures on other LFC sites – yet he still plays the jealousy card – “we’re the most popular, blah, blah” Maybe in Dunk’s world, he really is the biggest.

  9. fat_boy_fat Says:

    I reckon he will get at least 50 ass lickers signing up for the service.
    then they can say in a forum, Hey Dunk ive signed up for that rip off SMS service. Dunk will reply with his now pasted reply, ‘thanks for the support’.
    Then the ass licker can leave it on his screen to jerk off to because Dunk has replyd to him and EVEN praised him!
    If these people are that lonely maybe they should call this number 08457 90 90 90. The samaritans.
    By the way Oldham, they have registered charity status. Call them and find out how you go about it.

  10. Ringpiece Says:

    The Taxman will make his investigation of the last available year.
    He will then times it by the number of years that Dunkin has been trading for.

    In layman’s terms he’s heading straight into a shitstorm.

    They will throw the book at him (Not his book as it doesn’t exist).

  11. Chris Says:

    HAHAHAAHAH This “300 have signed up already in the first few hours” is one of the funniest things ive ever ever read.

    This site has already ripped the argument apart by showing how many users he has online, then theres stuff like there is no way he could go through 300 supposed applications/sign ups in a couple of hours, not when you’re operating something as expensive as that. What a crock of shite. The funny thing is some of the beauts on there will actually believe him

  12. rupertinsider Says:

    Hey Insider – another great piece of artwork – Jim Carrey, Trust Me, Liar Liar – approaching the kind of genius that breeds jealousy. I bet Oldham is dying to employ you. Are you available? Payment a free 3 month trial membership in the Glold Club – after giving your full name, address and credit card number.

  13. univofchicago Says:


    interesting tho. some hours before fatty put on the adverts, i remember a poster came out here to say that the sms service would be worth 30 in itself. was that fatty? if its not, then its some coincidence.

    in anycase, quality post, hilarious….hahahahahaha

  14. Richard S Says:

    300 Signups!!!! HAHAHAHA……There are only 120 Views on the Thread…..

    Where are the MORTGAGE PAYMENTS OLDHAM? I want to see the bank scans on the site.

  15. fat_boy_fat Says:

    and 4 of those 120 views was me.
    1st time because i lost my connection as i was reading
    2nd time to finish reading it
    3rd to copy and paste it for a certain blog
    and the 4th just to double check it wasnt a joke

  16. Disco Says:

    Small observation lads :

    You think 20,000 pre-orders (and him pocketing £100,000) for his book is likely, yet 300 sign-ups for this SMS thing isn’t?

    Make up your minds 😉

  17. Disco Says:

    (PS, clue – both figures are clearly bollocks 🙂 )

  18. Insider Insider Says:

    Disco – sorry if I’ve not explained this before – we try to show examples of where Dunk contradicts himself. I don’t believe he’s sold any fresh pre-orders of his book in the last 12 months, and at most doubt he got more than 100 at the height of his “fame”.

    He lies in almost everything he says. And he ties himself in knots in the process. He’s unbelievably poor and stinking rich – all in one day.

    If I’ve given the impression that I believe his 20,000 copies story then I’m sorry, because I most certainly don’t. I’m quite a sarcastic person at times, some people don’t spot it all the time. I do believe he’s ripped a few people off with his never-to-be-released book though.

  19. rupert Says:

    Disco is stuck on his debating point and can’t, or won’t, see the big picture.

  20. Disco Says:

    Insiderinsider – I realise you probably don’t believe it, but lots of people clearly do.

    Anyway, I’ll go back to my rock!

  21. Insider Insider Says:

    Trouble is Disco is that Dunk’s comments over the years have worked on a lot of people. People really do believe he’s rich. Or poor, depending on when it was they joined Koptalk and which phase he was going through that week.

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