Koptalk: No Abuse, No Trolls, No Rival Fans

The owner of Koptalk, still not in the North West by the way, had this message today for the few remaining people paying his site a visit.

ktiislime11.jpgPosted by KOPTALK.COM on 10-07-06 02:28 PM

At KopTalk we’re proud that we don’t let just any fool into our communities. (No, Koptalk’s fools are a special type of fool. Not all Koptalk members are fools though.) Not only that but we also don’t tolerate idiots (again, not all Koptalk members are idiots, but there are plenty on there) and soon eject them if required, for the benefit of all our members. It is likely that you will see these bitters on other LFC websites. (The idiots tend not to be tolerated on other sites either, but the sensible ones who leave Koptalk  show up and stick around elsewhere. And they tend to report the facts of what happened to them – like having been the victim of a theft by Koptalk.)

To become a member of our forums here costs nothing but we don’t accept applications from throw-away (free) email accounts. You must use your ISP, college or work email account to register for access. (Why are you going to cry to a member’s boss if they ask one of THE questions? Like “Where’s my book?” for example.)

If you cannot obtain such an address, you can apply for free access by post providing you include proof of identity or address. (WARNING: DO NOT SEND ANY OFFICIAL DOCUMENTS TO KOPTALK. IDENTITY THEFT IS A BIG PROBLEM IN THE UK. DUNCAN OLDHAM AND KOPTALK ARE NOT REGISTERED FOR THE STORAGE OF THIS INFORMATION.) Simply go to http://www.koptalk.misinfo and open a support ticket for assistance. (This is the support ticket system that gets ignored if you ask why you were prevented from accessing a service you paid for.)

We understand that these strict conditions aren’t popular but if you want to participate in a community without having to rub shoulders with idiots, then you’ll make a bit of an effort to join us. It will be worth it when you look at some of the other dross around the web. (There’s a few gems in this para. You do “rub shoulders with idiots”, if you use Koptalk, as mentioned above. Certain idiots are tolerated, some of them are even moderators. Dunk may be surprised to learn that considering he’s speaking here to potential new members, he’s not exactly selling a “great community” is he? How many can be bothered to “make an effort” to join such a poorly-run site? You’ve made your own site even more dross than it was when this blog started Duncan, so congratulations.)

It’s not nice turning people away because they have applied using a free email account but we want to help deter idiots which includes former (banned) members and people associated to rival websites. (He’s off again – he’s obsessed with everyone who’s against him having been banned before or associatied to a rival website. Wake up Duncan, smell the coffee over the stench of your sweaty trainers and see that most of the LFC-supporting internet world are now against you and your sites.)

You can join our VIP website at http://www.koptalkinsider.coN as an Insider member or a Gold Club member with a free email address. The reason we allow that over there is because not many people are stupid enough to pay only to be banned. (No – the reason there is that you need the dosh. Desperately. And you are going to lock out more members if they don’t post as often as you decide they must. I hope that’s in your Terms and Conditions now Fatblob.)

And he’s not bothered by the blog remember – he loves the extra publicity, because there is no such thing as bad publicity. Did we mention he’s still not arrived in the North West? Has he introduced new staff member Jeannie yet?

Koptalk: From FootyMad to BarkingMad in a few short years.


17 Responses to “Koptalk: No Abuse, No Trolls, No Rival Fans”

  1. rupertinsider Says:

    Can you just see him objecting to the jury in his trial.

    “I don’t want that one – I think he looks like someone I banned”.

    “I don’t want that one either – don’t like the way he’s looking at me”

    “Don’t want him – the thin one – I don’t trust thin ones”.

    “No not him, not the one with glasses, he’s too clever looking”.

    Judge: “Mr. Oldham this is all very well and good but we have to assemble a jury – is there anyone you would accept as unbiased.

    Fatty: “Can I have Stevie and me Ma, m’lud”

    Judge: “But they’ve turned Queen’s evidence, they’re now witnesses for the prosecution. Anyone else?”

    Fatty: “Well m’lud there were a couple of teenage girls I met on MySpace….”

  2. barry wom Says:

    fuck me. all fatty must do all day is think of ways to restrict people using his site at a time you think he’d be glad to get anyone he could. soon all that’ll be left on there will be DJ, Ryan, steve, wallet, the informer and dunk … although the last 3 are obviosuly just dunks multiple personalities.

  3. rupertinsider Says:

    I’ll be the last to be banned.

    All the others will have gone.

    Just Fatty and me – eye to eye.

    In that moment he will know for sure it was me wot did it.

    The final showdown.

    High Noon.

    That’s when I’ll ask him when his book will be out.

  4. motty Says:

    rupe, I’d love to know who you are. I’m working on the inside too 🙂

  5. rupertinsider Says:

    Good for you motty. The numbers are growing daily.

  6. fat_boy_fat Says:

    The rumblings are growing bigger over at KT

    Looks like Tom is getting really pissed off. If Dunk isnt careful he could lose one of his very few genuine insiders and decent poster.
    The Lurker thread has been locked out and Tom has started a new thread asking why its been locked. He didnt seem a happy chappy.
    BTW no sign of dunk posting in the exective lounge 2 thread. Maybe he is scared of saying something to send Tom over the edge

  7. Barney Says:

    I want to be on the inside too (Oh shit, I forgot Sloth banned me last week).

    Would love to know which RESPECTED AND TRUSTED members of Koptalk are bringing him down from within.

    Any ideas how much his hits and subscription have dropped off since this blog started.


  8. Ringpiece Says:

    Ringpiece is a gold club member.
    Till his subscription ends!

    In the meantime I will continue to watch the demise.

  9. rupertinsider Says:

    What’s Dunk doing there? He said he was going to be in the North West all week and the KT “HQ” would be run by “the staff”.

    I went over earlier today with three of my favoruite aliases to sign in for my monthly qualifying posts – but I couldnt’ find a single interesting thread to respond to. And there was no way I was going to start a new thread.

  10. fat_boy_fat Says:

    Im a gold club member. im staying for as long as it takes for the good people at this site to bring him down.
    If you need any copying & pasting doing lemme know.

  11. jj_sawyer Says:

    I find it very interesting that a lot of koptalk posters have now setup a free site on their own for the koptalk refugees.

    For those that don’t know, like me until 10 minutes ago, the new site is http://www.est1892.co.uk

    Many of the more recognisable posters such as Kaip, AnfieldForever, Iceman, Red_Al_77, The Milkman, Scully, Fowler_God, MrMichael have moved to there, and hopefully, actually surely, more will soon be following.

    Come on everyone repeat after me….. Fattys site is falling down, falling down. Fattys site is falling down. Ha ha fatty.

  12. fat_boy_fat Says:

    Welcome to your new slimer family jj_sawyer 🙂
    Spread the word because your a bit of a high flyer in KT land so ive heard . 🙂

  13. ringpiece MK2 Says:

    ringpiece mk 2 is a gold member also ! watch out mr oldham its starting to crumble !

  14. chapeau du soleil Says:

    hahaha, I keep chuckling at that Dr Who pic of Del

  15. univofchicago Says:


    LOL rupert.

  16. lobster Says:

    u can see the fat boy is losing much sleep now, watching over his back.

  17. KT Veteran Says:

    Many familiar faces on the new forum

    which is good

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