Golden Brown – Fatty's Christmas Message, 2005

Nothing to report from fatso-land. In other words the lazy webmaster has yet to get his arse out of bed, or is in fact already on his way to the Wallsend BNP Social Club to down a few pints before during and after the England game. No doubt he’ll use a bit of his legendary charm on one of the barmaids too, meaning he’ll not be updating his site all weekend.
NO INSIDE INFORMATION – MADE UP, STOLEN OR OTHERWISE. If there was any, we’d have it on here for you, to save you some money.

With that in mind we might as well have another laugh at an old outburst of his.

Back in December 2005 (yes, 6 months ago) he was getting some stick from members of another internet forum, in a thread entitled “F*ck Dunk the S*n hat wearing c*nt”. It was quite possibly one of the funniest threads ever seen on an internet forum, as more and more of Dunk’s previously gullible readers started to see a side to him they’d never before realised was there. People were banned left right and centre from Koptalk for asking perfectly reasonable questions.

It’s his love and support for the most obnoxious and sickening newspaper in British history – The Sun – that got him the attention. No matter what he says, he can’t leave the paper alone. Although it’s a serious issue that he not only ignores the boycott but actively seeks to promote the paper it is quite reassuring to see that the vast majority of internet-using Liverpool supporters support the boycott. As a result the more he tries to justify his support for the rag the more stupid he looks. Which brings a lot of humour to something quite serious.

The forum thread started with this from a poster called “Maldini” –

Up to his old tricks again, “Newspaper reports today suggest that John Arne Riise has disgraced himself by selling his Champions League winners medal on eBay. ”

guess which newspaper that would be?

In the end there were 1271 messages on that thread, and it probably takes about 3 weeks of solid reading day and night to get through it all. People would arrive from Koptalk defending their master, popping back and forth between the two forums trying to educate the people from the nasty forum about how much of a nice guy Mr Duncan really was. Slowly but surely they were put straight. Partly by posters from the nasty forum, but mainly by the actions of Mr Duncan himself.

This is a response he put on his website about the stick he was getting. No doubt it convinced some of his readers, but that’s because it’s full of holes and lies – as ever. He refused to let anyone point that out of course, but the damage was done elsewhere. In the end this sort of constant lying is what resulted in us creating this blog.

An unwitting comedy legend like Duncan Oldham deserves to be celebrated for what he is – a laughing stock. The following may make you cry.

Duncan Oldham, December 2005.
In 1998 I attended the World Cup finals in France. While in Marseille these birds were putting England hats on football supporters. On one side was a Tango logo, the other the Sun logo. I thought I had a Tango hat on but even if I thought I had a Sun hat on, I would have still worn it. It was after those World Cup finals in 1998-99 that my very popular mailing list evolved into a website. As someone not from Liverpool I was unaware of what the Sun had said in 1989 when I was 14 years old. Even to this day, many fans that aren’t from the city or were too young to be there, don’t know about what the Sun did which is why I encourage my readers to educate them rather than turn on them as if they are willingly ignorant.

When I first started the KopTalk website there was no Hillsborough support websites so it was only through the education of fans based in Liverpool that started logging-on to KopTalk, that people such as myself were educated about The Sun. Eventually we were lucky to see more and more websites sprout up that detailed what was said by the Sun. You could even buy books online now about the disaster thanks to Amazon so you could educate yourself further.

The question is, would I have worn such a hat today, knowing what had happened? Of course not.

KopTalk isn’t a huge campaigning website. Yes we’ll publicise events and news relating to such matters. The HJC often send us things to publish and we do, even though the club won’t recognise the HJC, instead choosing to endorse the HFSG. Although the club don’t recognise the HJC, I do, which is why I bought them a new PC to them a couple of years ago when they had their offices screwed.

I don’t usually respond to pathetic, ill-informed swipes made by small LFC websites who are bitter at the success achieved with KopTalk, especially by an out of towner. There’s handful of these sites out there, some of which host our banned former members, hence the bitterness. Now I’ve made mistakes over the years but now that I’m in my thirties I have learnt a lot as a result.

I go out of my way to help Reds behind the scenes and contrary to the believes found on a selection of bitter LFC fans websites, KopTalk doesn’t make any kind of profit. It did do during the .com bubble period as companies were throwing money around and I capitalised on that and made sure my family were secure without having to sell off the site, which I was offered large sums of money for. I couldn’t turn my back on my readers.

When the .com bubble burst, advertising revenues nosedived. For 1000 displayed ads, you may have been paid anything between £200 and £1000. Today, you’d be lucky if that amount of ads generated 50 pence. Because of this huge drop in revenue alternative ways had to be found to make money to survive hence the introduction of subscriptions. Instead of asking for donations – like many LFC websites do – I decided it was fairer to reward contributors with their own website. Newspapers charge for content, fanzines charge for content, LFC charge for access. A busy website should be no different, especially one run by one single person that has chosen to remain independent of the suits.

Take this week for example, I have just sent £1500 as the final instalments for the new KOPTALK.COM website design. The site didn’t need to be made better looking or better, I could easily have blown that last instalment over Christmas on myself and family but I didn’t. Instead I borrowed it off me mam. Each month I spend around £1000-a-month on our free SMS service, £1000+ on webhosting, £1000+ on utility bills. I’ve shelled out for new forum software licences, custom skins and so on – all to try and offer a better site for my readers. There are phone bills, office costs, mobile bills, cameras, organisers, photocopiers, ink, printers, sofwtare, internet access, Sky subs, columnists/interviews, foreign subs, satellite gear, maintenance, drinks and food for helpers, couriers/post, koptalk radio (£200+ montly) moderator gifts (every moderator received a gift worth £100 for Christmas), fuel etc etc etc. Where am I supposed to find this money by myself? Find me one LFC website out there run by a one man band that offers the level of service that I do? There isn’t one – FACT! There are good LFC websites out there but I’m addicated to my site and my readers.

I work voluntary, Steve works voluntary, my 12 year old daughter works voluntary, my mum works voluntary, Chloe works voluntary, my wife works voluntary – all to make things tick. All the mods work voluntary. All of us are ardent Reds. It’s a family affair.

Both Steve and myself put in up to 16 hours every day of the week. He’s left school now and I’m trying my best to educate him to become a success in his own right. I’m trying to improve his English, I’m trying to train him up. He’s only 16 but he’s a good lad and he makes it tick too.

One criticism I have seen raised against me is that I promote fundraising for my disabled cousin Lauren. At just 17, last year she was suddently paralysed for life. No previous illness, nothing. She’s a big Red, acknowledged by Steven Gerrard himself last year. If I can’t help my own family, it’s a sad, sad day. So I have a nice car and a nice house. Wel I’ve worked damn hard for it. When I started KopTalk I had a £200 Ford Fiesta with no handbrake so to achieve my dreams has been amazing. But I have never and will never, turn my back on my readers.

If anyone doesn’t like KopTalk, don’t visit KopTalk. If you don’t like me, Steve, the mods, our reporting style – which tries to be controversial to spark debate hence kop ‘TALK’ – don’t visit us. We like to think we welcome every Liverpool fan be they in Anfield or Australia. We’re not bothered about race, religion, sexuality, status or nothing. As long as you have Red in your heart and respect our communities then you’ll do for us.

I have made great friendships with some of the biggest legends to ever represent the club, both present day and past. As long as I have their support, and the support of my readers, that’s all that matters. What some rejects may say on other sites doesn’t concern me.

In March 2006 I hope to have my book on general sale. In it, it will respond to every claim ever made and boy I can’t wait for payback time. Those people who have tried to make things difficult for a fellow Red will regret it because I have so much on them. It’s going to be fun. They will be sorry. The book was an idea of mine a couple of years ago. I made it available for pre-order to get an idea on numbers and since then only 1 person got sick of waiting and asked for a refund. It will be published when I am ready, not when others are ready.

In July 1999 I married Maria at Anfield. Not the suberb, but the actual stadium. We had our pictures taken in our season tickets, the works. During the reception (while the speeches were on) we even had the Feyenoord v Liverpool game on every television in the European suite! Superb! My daughter (12) still receives personal Christmas presents and cards from Michael Owen, her favourite player. My son Lil Robbie is named after Robbie Fowler but as documented on the site by myself, he’s taken a soft spot to Newcastle because his nana lives there and in his own words, it’s his local side. Of course he still has his LFC shirts etc but it’s his life and I admire his mentality – he’s more switched on and mature than half of these clowns on the web. Because of this I bought season tickets so that Steve or Charlotte could take him to the odd match. I have used the same season tickets to see probably 2 or 3 games in 2 years, usually Liverpool. Criminal offence? Grow up.

In 2005 I was approached an asked to help create some additional club websites. I announced this myself on KopTalk. They would feature Spurs, Newcastle and other teams – even Forest! The idea is to create a hub of sites but I and my team (Steve, mum, Charl etc) work purely on KopTalk and always will. However if I want to be involved with such projects then I will. It is nobody elses business. The money will help advance KopTalk because every penny I get in goes back into the site.

Another issue I have been raised about is legal action against other websites. This has never been taken regardless of the claims. To suggest I sued a 15 year old is laughable. I did though win a legal case against a website group that tried to take me on and the judge laughed at them. Told them they had wasted his and my time and made them pay up to me and pay my costs which is a rare ruling as you usually pay your own, even if you win. That website group has a current LFC website that is very anti-KopTalk as a result. But it makes me laugh when people don’t know why they hate us so much.

Finally, KopTalk did once look at generating revenue by offering shares. In 24 hours more than £1million was received but Future Publishing, my backers at the time, threatened action against me if I proceeded saying they had first rights to buy the site. This was not a public float as has been claimed. I was forced to issue refunds which did take time because of the sheer volume but everyone to my knowledge was sorted. If someone claims they haven’t, get them to call us, get them to email us, get them to call in person with you by their side to see if they’re genuine or just telling porkies to try and slur the site. That was the only reason we couldn’t do the share thing as I was under contract and Future had me. When I was free of that contract NetBetSports tried to but the site and offered close to £500,000 for a very small percentage of the site. I rejected them as it didn’t feel right. They later went bust but their group still exists and the guy is minted. I did the right thing though.

Everything you read on the net is usually jealousy aimed at my achievements. Some people are also bitter because they may have been banned or they don’t like out of towners. Some are still crying over the fact they lost in court against me. Some people don’t like my controversial style, some people believe we should force opinions on people, I don’t. I don’t believe anyone should be made to justify their support of Liverpool Football Club. If someone makes other allegations, why do they not come to me if they have a problem or if it’s something they say was never resolved, why have they never come to my office, or called me? I’ll tell you why, because they’re in dream world and they make nonsense up to try and stir things.

Some people say I registered domains of other LFC sites to make money. Funny that, I’ve never tried to sell them even when I’ve been offered more money. No thanks. I offered one LFC site a domain I own which I had before they were a LFC website. They offered me money I said no and that I was prepared to give them the domain myself when it was due for renewal and that I would meet the costs myself. However, this site became a base for banned forum members and the site allowed themselves to become anti-KT so instead I told ’em to get f***ed and the domain now points at a holding page. Other sites that have either a) spammed KopTalk or b) published lies, may have also come unstuck because if they make life difficult for me, I’ll make it difficult for them and I will do what I can to defend my readers from such nonsense. If an LFC site is ok with me, I’m ok with them but if they try it on, they will come unstuck because I don’t suffer fools gladly. Do you know one anti-KT site even suggested my daughter who was 6 at the time, should be kidnapped and raped? That’s how nice some of these people are.

It is very sad that others have to concentrate on KopTalk. As Vegard Heggem once said to me, it comes with the territory of been the best. I’ve also been told by Tommy Smith that if you’re a nobody, people don’t talk about you and they only want successful people to fall. In an ideal world every LFC site and ever LFC site would respect their fellow fans but it’s not an ideal world. There’s enough room for anyone and everyone. People should concentrate on their own success and failures rather than those of others and that’s why I’ve done well with KopTalk. You won’t see me slating other sites even if they deserve it. I find it petty, time wasting and I don’t believe it’s what my readers want.

At the end of the day my readers, and myself, just want to support Liverpool Football Club and it’s only them that I am bothered about.

Now I won’t be drawn on the issue of other clowns any more. I’m a busy man and also a busy father who is preparing for Christmas to put a smile on my kids faces. KopTalk and LFC first, family second 😉



(not checked for spelling errors or english, can’t be arsed)

Koptalk Gold. Impossible to follow really. Feel free to leave comments here, or if you prefer there’s now a “Koptalk” section at specifically to talk about this kind of thing.


12 Responses to “Golden Brown – Fatty's Christmas Message, 2005”

  1. macca2 Says:

    yeah, i remember the thread…

    i was still a koptalk regular then. dunk suddenly went on a rant in one of his editorials/threads (can’t remember which) and somehow found myself in the TLW forum. i remember reading the LONG thread and thinking to myself, this can’t be true. the allegations were so OUTRAGEOUS i actually believed fattys words for a while. but then i came across THIS blog that made me realize that fatty was indeed an absolute con.

    see, the problem with dunk and all his problems is that the things he does is SO OUTRAGEOUS that its hard to believe. its all true but it takes a lot of convincing. das why this blog deserves a LOT of credit for digging up the truth in an EFFECTIVE manner.

  2. rupert Says:

    Could you give a link to the thread that he was responding to – I never saw it. What site?

    Actually his “defence” is remarkable in the number of admissions he unwittingly makes – from stealing domain names from other sites and his admission he uses dirty tricks to attack those he considers his rivals/enemies.

    I’ve no idea who or what was involved in the court case he allegedly won – but the transcripts or disclosures in that trial might make interesting reading for Internal Revenue and the “social”.

    Do you notice they only thing he always avoids in all these defences he puts out – is his two year long smear campaign against Robbie Fowler – his deal with the owner of the Blue Bar – his trying to sell stories about Fowler (and other players) to the national tabloids in order to make money and publicise his site, hsi headline when Robbie was forced out “Close the Door on your Way Out”. His only allusion to it is to say he named his son Robbie after Fowler – that’s his son who is a Newcastle supporter.

  3. Chunky Says:

    “In 1998 I attended the World Cup finals in France.”

    Didn’t somebody point out it was a EURO 96 S*n hat?

  4. rupert Says:

    Others on here have said they will make a report to the Internal Revenue. The problem is we don’t know if they have. Because there is no organised opposition he gets away with ripping off LFC supporters and the state year in and year out. He uses his finances to compete unfairly with other fan sites and to attack them in the courts and on the net.

    In my opinion the threat to inform Internal Revenue and the “social” has unhinged him. That is the reason he claimed last week that his real name is not Duncan Oldham – another lie.

    I’m prepared to draft up a full report to Internal Revenue and the Department of Employment about him.

    And because he uses his family and employee as part of his defence/attack I think I should add a report about Steve and Ma Oldham. I suspect that he has them working for him while drawing unemployed benefits. (He said in that piece that Steve works 16 hours a day without pay – he said a couple of weeks ago that Steve works 18 hours a day without pay and gets to sleep in the KT offices at night and has unrestricted access to porn) .

    I’d appreciate if anyone could provide factual information – post it here or perhaps Insider would allow the use of his email and pass it on to me. If the information is already online I’d appreciate a link.

    If anyone can offer advice as to how the best way to set the information up and submit it – that would be appreciated. Perhaps there are some factors I should stress over others. Otherwise I’ll just go ahead use common sense and follow the instructions on the IR site.

    Basically I need to know the names and address of Fatty, his Ma and Steve.

    Then an outline of his claims since he started KT.

    Specifically I need to itemise his claims concerning income – whether from memberships, sales, court awards or donations to his various “causes”.

    I need other supporting information such as his claims on MySpace that he makes 250,000 a year. Also all his calims about his wealth – house purchases, paying off family mortgages, cars – how many and what type he has – audio-video equipment, holidays etc etc – anything that is prove of his wealth.

    Let’s make it a thorough submission.

    First I need the names and addresses of Duncan Oldham, his mother and Steve.

  5. Ringpiece Says:

    I know this is slightly off subject but has anyone ever done anything about that fat fucks lottery swindle.
    He waits till after the draw before he produces the numbers, I think i’ll start one of them! I’ll be a fuckin millionaire in no time!
    He’s having a fuckin laugh with his horseshit lottery every saturday night, must sit there laughing at all the gullible koptalkers typing “Im in”
    I do the lottery online, it would take 10 seconds (If that!) to cut & paste the numbers over onto the forum.

    More horseshit, how long can it go on for?

  6. Insider Insider Says:

    Hi Ringpiece (love that username).

    I’ve not looked at his lottery swizz myself, but if he genuinely does do the lottery – online or off – it would not be hard to prove it.

    Online – A screenshot from the national lottery website, shown before the draw, would prove it. He’d also be able to show all his previous bets from that website too, just to prove he’s not been lying for weeks on end.

    Offline – A scan of his lottery “playslip” – again, wouldn’t take long to do, and it’s so easy even young Steve could do it.

    If he can’t, it’s because he doesn’t do it. There’s no other reason he can give. And if he’s thinking of “mocking up” some screenshots I’d advise against it. There’s too many people on here who can spot faked images.

    We’d also like to see some scans and photos of his season tickets too.

  7. Insider Insider Says:


    Different things are going on “behind the scenes” by numerous visitors to this blog. I’ve promised to keep these efforts confidential though. Suffice to say that people are using a lot of different methods to try and put things right through various channels.

    I’m happy for people to email me with any information they have and to then pass it on to you. So if you’ve got anything at all, addresses, phone numbers, anything that might help, email it to koptalk.insider @ I’ll then pass it on to Rupert. Just make sure you point out to me that it’s for Rupert’s attention, and say whether or not you want your own details passing on to Rupert. I won’t pass your details on unless you tell me to.

    People have actually asked me whether Dunk can find out about them contacting us. The answer is “no”. If you email the koptalkinsider @ gmail address it’s only seen by me. If you leave a comment on this blog, you choose what to use as a “username” and you can also leave a false email address if you prefer. Your IP address is stored, but nobody else sees it other than us behind the blog.

    You’d be surprised be some of the names we have been speaking to on and off.

  8. rupert Says:

    macca2 – Thanks for the link to the thread – I’ve reached page 20 but had to come up for air. I’ll go back and try to finish it sometime. There are one or two nuggets of information.

    My predominant impression is that as a critique of KT and Fatty and his performing feaks – that thread is not so great. It began when the editor, Dave, referred to two exclusive stories he had just published and predicted Fatso would steal them within an hour or two – and voila! Fatso stole them and sold them to his Gold Club members as his own.

    But because it started with that particular prediction and complaint it was never a comprehensive or coherent analysis of Fatso or KT. It also allowed Fatso’s minnions to try to head it off by sophist arguments about the generality of that particular complaint, or the style of the TLW posts or anything but the substance of KT corruption.

    But with all its limitations the thread did offer some hilariously funny posts.

    The second impression is how strongly Ryan and DJ come across as Nazi Youth.

    “I didn’t know the Furher was doing bad things, and anyways, he didn’t do really, really naughty things, or if he did he did’nt do them to me. Heil Hitler.”

    DJ virtually screams at one of the posters ” you hav to be punished”. I can just see the monocle glinting in his one eye and hear his Germanified Danish accent – yes he’s Danish.

    Ryan manages to find a new “voice”. He not only composed post longer the one line, but did not scream personal abuse, string expletives together and never once uses “wank” “muck” “shyte” as he does all the time on KT. In fact, he accuses them of that!

  9. Whois Lookup Says:

    “KopTalk isn’t a huge campaigning website. Yes we’ll publicise events and news relating to such matters. The HJC often send us things to publish and we do, even though the club won’t recognise the HJC, instead choosing to endorse the HFSG. Although the club don’t recognise the HJC, I do, which is why I bought them a new PC to them a couple of years ago when they had their offices screwed.”

    He did buy the PC eventually, 9 months after it was promised and its purchase splashed all over the web as an example of his generosity via news articles/editorials. In the intervening 9 months he and his acolytes used this “purchase” as a shield to deflect other types of criticism until the very reasonable HJC lost patience, and had a “strong word” suggesting he actually buy the PC or steps would be taken. Of course there were many excuses given for the delay, many of them shown to be blatant lies, up to the actual week of delivery. The general opinion was that he was hoping everyone would forget about it and he’d get away without buying it.

    His/Koptalk’s stance on Hillsborough has fluctuated wildly. They’ve regularly removed publicity for events and news on the precept that KT was a non-political site and fans wanted to join to get away from the politics. On other occasions he’s blamed the forum software for deleting the threads. It was suggested he set up a Hillsborough forum as other sites have done which he did, but then he got rid of it, brought it back, got rid of it again. Now it appears porn has a higher priority on Koptalk version 2006.

  10. Toby Says:

    As far as I’m aware the post office are obliged to divulge the real postal address of PO Box owners. I think you’ll probably have to request the info in writing though.

  11. rupert Says:

    Toby – or Internal Revenee can .

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