Move to Melwood may have to wait admits lardie

Here’s the latest on Koptalk HQ West. From house overlooking Melwood he added the hotel in the city – both places to provide free accomodation as and when required for all of his £30 a year subscribers. So generous.

At first he told us he had people looking for a property for him. It seems that wasn’t really what he meant. No, he’s not actually able to do anything about it at the moment. Not enough thirty quids in yet.

Dunk KopTalk Editor  Reged: Aug 20 2004 Posts: 7906
Re: Exciting Developments at KOPTALK  [Re: probe1]
#1516086 – Thu Jun 29 2006 11:36 AM          Reply      Quote

Each year the site grows. Last year I managed to buy this place for the office so that managed to get me out of home for the first time. It’s good working at home but it can have negatives also.

We’ve had our best summer ever this time around. Take the World Cup for example, more people are betting so there’s 10 times more commissions than normal.

Now it’d be easy to pocket the wonga but for me it’s about the next challenge. If there’s no challenge, what’s the point?

I don’t have time to buy properties. Someone will do it for me. When I moved up here I didn’t even know where I was moving to I just told me mam to find a house and the first time I saw it was the day it was completed and I got the keys.

With the Melwood project though I will take time to make sure we get what we need and at the right price.

Thankfully I have a family that doesn’t say “You’re mad, look after yourself”. When I told them what I was doing they were over the moon as a) it gets me closer to some of my family who live in Liverpool and b) they know how important covering LFC is to me.

The money isn’t there to do this now though. Truth be told I struggled a bit to get the money for my season tickets this year BUT I know what’s due in and with plenty of hard graft over the coming season we can achieve whatever we want.

This will happen.

Of course it will Fatty. Best summer ever? Of course it is. Love this bit – I don’t have time to buy properties. Someone will do it for me. When I moved up here I didn’t even know where I was moving to I just told me mam to find a house… In just a couple of sentences our hero moves from high-powered wheeler-dealer to the guy that gets his mummy to do everything for him. She still does his washing for him too (the local launderette had to close down three times after he’d used their facilities).

Note the line about struggling to afford the season tickets this year. The fact he hasn’t got any is bad enough but from saying he can afford to buy a house in Melwood for cash to saying he’s struggling to afford the cost of two season tickets is another of his self-made bullshit traps.

If you’ve got those season tickets Dunk, why not post us a photo of the evidence? Take the photo of them at Koptalk Shed 2 like the pictures you took of those pies today, with a copy of that day’s paper underneath. If you can’t do that we all know why.

It’s a big pity this Melwood move is all another of his delusional fantasies, because it would be nice to go and see him in person without having to travel over to the North East. We’ve a long list of questions we’d like to ask him.

Talking of questions, “Ask Del” has been proving popular. A tricky one here though – someone actually used to live next to Melwood and he needs to distract them before they ask a question that shows him up to be all the more of a dickhead.

Peatcheo 1st Team Player Posts: 1577 Loc: Childwall, Liverpool 29-06-06 11:16 AM – Post#246162     

Alrite Dunk where about round Melwood will you be moving? I used to live next door to the training ground on Melwood Drive but moved to the other side of the city.     Did you see those stylish kids in the Riot?

Dunk KopTalk Editor Posts: 1944 Loc: KOPTALK 29-06-06 11:46 AM – Post#246198     
    In response to Peatcheo

Not sure yet mate. We’re looking at what’s on the market and where. Very excited about this though.

Admit it fatboy. You’ve no plans at all to move. You’re just mad. As in angry and as in mentally disturbed.

This blog that doesn’t bother you is getting to you. 😉


13 Responses to “Move to Melwood may have to wait admits lardie”

  1. rupert Says:

    I made a comment a couple of days ago that his manic-depressive swings are becoming more frequent. But this takes the cake!

    In a few hours he goes from being Scarborough’s Donald Trump employing top-notch agents to find prime properties in Melwood and downtown Liverpool which he will then make available free to his internet buddies – from that to be to being a skint, Newcastle-based LFC supporter, who just had a windfall from his job as bookie’s runner. Just enough windfall to pay for his Anfield season ticket.

    As I and others pointed out before – he daren’t be seen at Anfield. The nearest he gets is when he and his servant Steve drive their virtual van to the virtual streets near their virtual Anfield (actually in the alley behind his house in Mansfield) and broadcast on Koptalk Radio with the help of live TV streams and BBC Radio Live.

    Reminds me of that movie about baseball where the commentator reads the action a few minutes off a ticker tape and has this little piece of wood and hammer to make noises like the ball bouncing of the bat.

  2. Terry Says:

    Brilliant, can barely pay for a season ticket at Newcastle, but can afford a house.

    Give up you fat shit.

  3. 5times Says:

    thought it might be worth pointing out that he has made his myspace account private now

  4. Toby Says:

    Out of interest what is his myspace page? May have to don that blonde wig and go incognito, all for the sake of undercover journalism of course.

  5. rupert Says:

    Someone please write to him to con him into releasing his profile for us.

  6. Jon Says:

    Isn’t myspace just a hang out for perverts and peadohpiles?

  7. scully Says:

    I saw his myspace page a couple of months ago. All I remember is there were a few blondes in his ‘friends’ section (one of them taking the piss out of his regularly saying Michael Owen’s returning to Liverpool) and that he listed his ‘salary range’ as above £250,000 a year. Hmmm…..

  8. rupert Says:

    250,000 smackers per annum. What’s the number of that Internal Revenue site again?

  9. macca2 Says:

    yeah, i remember that scully.

    someone please call the tax people!!

  10. macca2 Says:


    The Hotline can take your call on 0800 788 887 (Lines are open Monday to Friday 8am to 8pm, Saturday and Sunday 8am to 4pm), or you can submit a report here.

  11. Neil Says:

    Was wondering about the cost of a house on Melwood Drive. Seems around £143,000 is the average. That’s a lot of pies, FatCunt.

  12. rupert Says:

    “Seems around £143,000 is the average.”

    There goes the neighbourhood – if you wait till Fatso moves in you could probably get one for 30,000.

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