Dunks Melwood Source

Mike Kelly, Roys former no2 at fulham was at Melwood all week and is to be announced on Monday, how come dunce and his source never broke the story ?

Duncan Oldham the conman caught out again

For the past 5 days, Duncan Oldham has been claiming that Kenny Daglish was so upset by the comments of Chairman Martin Broughton in the Roy Hodgson press conference that Kenny picked up sticks, called christian purslow and told him he was taking a 3 week unscheduled leave of absence. He was so positive of this, Dunk challenged Liverpool Football club and all journalist’s to sue him for slander if it was not true.

Today 4th of July as spirit of shankly celebrated its own version of Independence day, (a celebration that Oldham mocked last week) Oldham made claims on contalk that Tony Evans of “The Times” had backed up the Kenny is leaving claims. Something happened though, dunce name dropped one too many times and has finally been called out on his shit by the main stream media.

Below is an article taken from anfieldroad.com a very popular Liverpool fan forum. The author, Jim Boardman is fastly becoming the voice for thousands of reds across twitter, facebook and various other blogs around the net

KopTalk’s Greatest Hits

Duncan Oldham tells so many lies on KopTalk that even he can’t keep track of them all, which has provided us with countless moments of unintentional hilarity since this blog began.

But there is a downside. Over the past four years, documenting this Everest of bullshit has required more than 800 articles and almost 15,000 comments. There’s a danger that Oldhams’s most deranged, pathetic and disgusting lies get lost in the swill of his routine, everyday bullshit.

So we’ve been trawling through the archives to put together what you might call KopTalk’s Greatest Hits. These are the moments when Oldham reveals his true colours, when he proves beyond doubt that he’s an unhinged fantasist who will say and do anything if he feels it will earn him money or attract attention.

Above all, they show the contempt with which Oldham views Liverpool fans. You can imagine him laughing his head off as he types this garbage, confident that he can insult our intelligence and still dupe us out of our money.

Oldham’s career in bullshitting has been nothing if not prolific. With such an extensive back catalogue, including the much-loved golden oldies Chris Waddle Has Offered To Sell Me His Melwood House and Someone Made A Bid Of £1.3 Million For A 10% Stake In KopTalk – And I Turned Them Down, we didn’t think we could do justice to the great man with just a single collection. So we’ll be giving him the multi-volume treatment he so richly deserves. Think of this as Duncan Oldham: The Best Of – Volume One.

And for any current KopTalk members reading this – do you ever get the feeling you’ve been conned?

Should I Buy A Melwood Property Overlooking The Training Pitches, Or One Overlooking The Gates? (3 July 2006)

“A lot will depend on where we buy. I fancy a house overlooking the training pitches but I also know that having the gate monitored would be very handy. It’s all down to wonga. I was quoted £250k today for a house at the gates and £150k for a house that overlooks the pitches.

Do we want a CCTV on the gates fed into our office or a webcam showing the lads training?”

Chris Waddle Has Offered To Sell Me His Melwood House (4 July 2006)

“Former England ace Chris Waddle has offered to sell me his house. It’s located close to Melwood and is on the market at £300,000. We’re going to go and see it within the next week. “

Liverpool FC’s summer 2010 transfer targets revealed / How to set up your own KopTalk-style LFC scam site

We don’t really want to inspire a glut of KopTalk-esque scam sites – one is more than enough – but we are very interested in showing you how unsophisticated the KopTalk con is. Pretty much anybody reading this could pull it off, if you had no qualms about telling cynical lies to Liverpool fans in order to dupe us out of our money.

First, you have to trawl through the BBC Football Gossip pages and the offal’s Media Watch section to compile a list of the players rumoured to be joining and leaving Liverpool since the last summer transfer window closed. These are the potential moves that have been reported in the national press and on mainstream internet sites:

PLAYERS IN:

Goalkeepers:

Jan Oblak (Olimpija Ljubljana), Adam Federici (Reading), Dida (AC Milan), Wayne Hennessey (Wolves).

Defenders:

Ryan Shawcross (Stoke City), Matthew Upson (West Ham), Christian Landu Landu (Viking), Simon Kjaer (Palermo), Herita Ilunga (West Ham left-back), Nicolas Hernan Otamendi (Velez Sarsfield), Bruno Ecuele Manga (Angers SCO), Vasilis Torosidis (Olympiakos right-back), Richard Stearman (Wolves right-back/centre half), Nedum Onuoha (Manchester City), Taye Taiwo (Marseille left-back), Rod Fanni (Rennes fullback), Adil Rami (Lille), Steven Mouyokolo (Hull City), Danny Wilson (Rangers), Aleksandar Kolarov (Lazio left-back), Moussa Kouyate (Paris FC), Gary Cahill (Bolton), Christoph Metzelder (Real Madrid, since signed for Schalke), Nicolas Otamendi (Velez Sarsfield), Madjid Bougherra (Rangers), Micah Richards (Manchester City), Phil Jones (Blackburn), Jan Vertonghen (Ajax), Reto Ziegler (Sampdoria), Sylvinho (Manchester City).

Midfielders:

Angel Di Maria (Benfica winger), Antoine Griezmann (Real Sociedad winger), Keisuke Honda (then of Dutch club VVV-Venlo, signed for CSKA Moscow in January), Jano Ananidze (Spartak Moscow), Vladimir Koman (Sampdoria, currently on loan at Bari), Juan Mata (Valencia), Eljero Elia (Hamburg), Milos Krasic (CSKA Moscow), Adam Johnson (Middlesbrough, since moved to Man City), Rafael Van der Vaart (Real Madrid), Hernanes (Sao Paulo), Yaya Toure (Barcelona – part exchange in a deal for Mascherano), Lassana Diarra (Real Madrid), Sebastian Giovinco (Juventus), Mahamadou Diarra (Real Madrid), Patrick Vieira (Inter, who later moved to Man City), Victor Moses (Crystal Palace, ended up going to Wigan in January), Arda Turan (Galatasaray), Scott Parker (West Ham), Nicolas Lodeiro (Nacional, signed for Ajax in January), James Milner (Aston Villa), Jeremy Menez (Roma), Sergio Canales (Racing Santander attacking midfielder, announced in February that he will sign for Real Madrid in July), Tom Cairney (Hull), Stephen Ireland (Man City), Mark Davies (Bolton), Steven Pienaar (Everton), Ibrahim Afellay (PSV), Javi Martinez (Athletic Bilbao), Joe Cole (Chelsea), Juan Manuel Vargas (Fiorentina winger), Eden Hazard (Lille), Georginio Wijnaldum (Feyenoord), Lee Chung-Yong (Bolton), David Silva (Valencia), Guti (Real Madrid), Michael Johnson (Manchester City), Royston Drenthe (Real Madrid), Joe Cole (Chelsea), Ever Banega (Valencia), Mesut Ozil (Werder Bremen), Caner Erkin (CSKA Moscow), Jesus Navas (Sevilla), David Bentley (Tottenham), Felipe Melo (Juventus), Valon Behrami (West Ham), James Milner (Aston Villa).

Strikers:

David Villa (Valencia), Emile Heskey (Aston Villa), Nilton (Vasco da Gama), Dieumerci MBokani (Standard Liege), Carlton Cole (West Ham), Roman Pavlyuchenko (Spurs), Aaron Hunt (Werder Bremen), Eduardo (Arsenal), Connor Wickham (Ipswich), Bojan Krkic (Barcelona – part exchange in a deal for Mascherano), Ruud van Nistelrooy (Real Madrid, since signed for Hamburg), Keirrison (then at Benfica, on loan from Barcelona, since signed 18-month loan deal with Fiorentina), Cedric Mongongu (Monaco), James Beattie (Stoke City), Kenwyne Jones (Sunderland), Roque Santa Cruz (Man City), Erik Huseklepp (SK Brann), Goran Pandev (Lazio, moved to Inter in January), Frederic Piquionne (Portsmouth, on loan from Lyon), Luis Suarez (Ajax), Louis Saha (signed a two-year extension to his deal at Everton in February), Nikola Zigic (Valencia),  Klaas-Jan Huntelaar (AC Milan), Milan Jovanovic (Standard Liege, announced he would join us but still tbc), Alexander Jacobsen (14-year-old Danish forward), Kevin Kuranyi (Schalke), John Cofie (Manchester United), Hugo Rodallega (Wigan), Manuel Gavilan (Real Betis), Raul (Real Madrid), Mario Balotelli (Inter), Diego Forlan (Atletico Madrid), Carlos Tevez (Manchester City), Karim Benzema (Real Madrid), Kristoffer Peterson (Savedalens IF), Haris Vuckic (Newcastle United), Alexis Sanchez (Udinese), Mamadou Niang (Marseille), Vincenzo Iaquinta (Juventus), Emmanuel Adebayor (Man City), Giampaolo Pazzini (Sampdoria), Giuseppe Rossi (Villareal), Adriano (Flamengo), Edin Dzeko (Wolfsburg), Diego Tardelli (Atletico Mineiro).

PLAYERS OUT:

Steven Gerrard (Real Madrid, Barcelona, AC Milan and Inter Milan), Fernando Torres (Man City, Chelsea, Barcelona and Juventus), Javier Mascherano (Barcelona, Juventus, Man City, Chelsea and Inter Milan), Dirk Kuyt (Juventus), Yossi Benayoun (Man City, Lokomotiv Moscow, Dinamo Moscow, Roma, Spurs, Aston Villa, Sevilla and Chelsea), Fabio Aurelio (to Olympiakos and AC Milan), Ryan Babel (half the clubs in Europe), Damien Plessis (Lazio Genoa and AEK Athens), Martin Skrtel (Juventus), Albert Riera, Alberto Aquilani (Fiorentina, Juventus), Diego Cavalieri (Benfica), Dani Pacheco (Celtic, loan), Krisztian Nemeth (to remain on loan with AEK Athens), Nabil El Zhar (AEK Athens, loan), Chris Mavinga (AEK Athens, loan), Thomas Ince (Chelsea), Jay Spearing (Leicester).

Next you need to invent some ludicrously-named aliases. We’ve gone for Pilkington, Wallet and The Informer. Depending on how much cider you’ve drunk, you now have to either strongly imply or boldly state that these aliases are in fact high-profile figures associated with Liverpool FC. We’ve decided that Pilkington is Christian Purslow, The Informer is Tony Barrett and Wallet may or may not be Philip Nash.

We’ve no idea why these people would be passing on classified information to members of a football forum that doesn’t even feature in Alexa’s list of the top 40 LFC sites. It doesn’t make any sense at all, but we aren’t going to let that stop us.

The third step is to create your own “insider” phrasebook. Here are a few tips to get you up and running:

Koptalk Team new members

Dunce posted this little beauty today in the chat room, not the main LFC section

I was given some new helpers on April 1st due to some changes at KopTalk Towers. KopTalk has grown considerably recently and this has enabled some help to be drafted in. Paid help too which is a first! It has been so difficult for me to oversee everything and I have struggled at times. Hopefully I can now spend more time on the site and allow others to deal with all the support stuff. Its a fact that his mother and her lover Ian have been on the payroll for years. koptalk has always been a family business from day one.

While KopTalk has to operate as a business, I always ensured that the site was run like the hobby it started out as. The only aim is to tick over and pay the bills until of course you all get tired of it and tell me to **** off.

why does koptalk have to be a business ? the only other site that is run as a business is the official LFC site. Other sites all run as a hobby and do just fine and reflect the real LFC community where free speech, open communication and real meet ups happen on a weekly basis

I genuinely do what I do because of my love for Liverpool FC, this is what I do every day, sometimes for as many as 18 hours and I’ve done it since the mid-90′s. I’d be lost without it and without you!

He has no other skills in life other than living off the backs of fellow reds.nothing you do is genuine dunce unless it lines your pockets. your motivation is money, always has and always will be.

I don’t need to be on KopTalk now. I can walk at anytime and leave it in the fine hands of others. I can quite willingly hang up the keyboard but while you continue to support the site and especially me, I will be here to try and keep you updated.
The old cry of you can hang it up anytime eh, who will pay for the two mortgages or the fancy Ipods or the trips back and forth for your family. Who will pay for Tracy Anne, your 3rd fiancee in two years flights from London ? Be honest dunce, as long as your squeezing 30 quid out of the last guy, you aint going anywhere

I also want to hang around to annoy the **** out of those on the internet that can’t stand me. Thanks to their promotional efforts; albeit negative, the site is doing better than it ever has as people are so nosey, so to them I say “thanks!”

sorry to hear you want to hang around but let me reassure you that we will be there at every turn to get the word out about you. There are Liverpool fans everywhere that cant stand you dunce. I do not know of one other forum that has a positive thing to say about you, not one. You have sunk so far in the LFC community that you cant even latch onto one credible blogger on twitter, such is the disdain Liverpool fans worldwide have for you.

I prefer to be open with you as as I know hence this update.
Honest ? You dont have enough credability to use words like honest. You sacrificed greed for this thing called Liverpool football club that we all do and your greed has isolated you. Its cost you mates, a wife and a family. Your step brother steve running off with herself. You want to be honest ? open up the free speech on your site, give members access to the pm functions. Let them post links to other sites and stop selling lies for memberships.

Make no mistake about it blog readers, Koptalk is in trouble. Yeah yeah he bangs on about new members when in reality those numbers are far and few in between. Its the people not renewing are his problem, hence the reaching out. current members have questioned him like we have never seen before and have provoked the actions of locking or deleting threads in such a heavy manner that even the stalwarts are raising eyebrows.

Keep up the good work everyone and please join our group http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=282059011184

Why has KopTalk failed to report a single big LFC story this year before it appeared in the national press?

It’s been a comedy masterclass on KopTalk over the past week, as Dunk takes up residence on fantasy island in preparation for the summer transfer window.

Oldham has already told so many lies this month that it would be impossible to list them all in one article. But the best/worst/funniest ones so far involve him having a contact within Kenny Dalglish’s immediate family, exchanging emails with “various Anfield luminaries”, and having sources close to Amanda Staveley and Fernando Torres’s agent.

It’s a risky strategy for Dunk. He knows that this sort of nonsense will alienate some of his existing members, the ones who have been on KopTalk for a couple of years and have slowly realised that he knows as much about the inner workings of Liverpool FC as they do. Having their intelligence insulted like this will be final straw for some. But Oldham calculates that he’ll tempt enough new victims into signing up to KT for it to be worth the risk.

Since the season began, Dunk has also told us that he has sources close to the Real Madrid board, Jose Mourinho, Xabi Alonso, Steven Gerrard, Jamie Carragher, and Tom Hicks or George Gillett (Dunk couldn’t reveal which, naturally). These posts are listed at the end of the article so everyone can have a cheap laugh at them.

As somebody said in a comment on here recently: “There are senior journos within world-class media organisations who don’t have these contacts.”

We all know Dunk reads this blog – he recently changed his avatar in our honour – so I have a question for him: why, with all these supposed contacts, has KopTalk failed to report any of the major LFC stories this year before they appeared in the national press?

KopTalk – April round-up

Over the coming days, we’ll be looking at the bullshit Dunk has been crapping out on KopTalk this month, but first there are a few more posts from April that deserve attention.

We all know that Oldham loves to steal stories from The S*n. He’s been doing it for years – click on the “SUN-lovers” sticky at the top of the page for proof. Oldham has even run adverts for that rag on KopTalk. A post by a KopTalk member calling Oldham a con man would be lucky to last five minutes before it was deleted, but ads for The S*n can stay up for two weeks or more.

It’s indefensible at any time of the year, but in the month of the Hillsborough anniversary, you’d think even Oldham would restrain himself. You’d be wrong – he stole at least two stories from The S*n in April. ­­

And he didn’t stop there. He put both of them on his front page – the headlines aimed at coaxing Liverpool fans into paying him £36 to subscribe to KopTalk. So in the month of the Hillsborough anniversary, Duncan Oldham tried to make money from stories taken from The S*n. Duncan Oldham is the scum of the earth.

Proof that KopTalk’s Duncan Oldham had no advance knowledge of the Martin Broughton and BarCap developments

Duncan Oldham knew nothing about the Martin Broughton and BarCap developments until the news had been announced in the national press, as will be proven later in this article.

But, as ever, he wasn’t going to let that stop him pretending to have his finger on the pulse. So he put out this bewildering report on KopTalk, which read like something from a tabloid horoscope column:

11/04/2010 07:43 PM Hicks and Gillett finally ready to quit Liverpool for good
KopTalk Team
KOPTALK sources recently told our VIP members that the forthcoming week would be of particular interest and singled out the 17th as a key date. It would appear that they were accurate even though the information supplied was not specific.
While the media claim that there is strong interest from various parts of the globe, we’re led to believe that most of these claims are complete nonsense and that nobody has brought anything serious to the table since the global financial crisis kicked in.

This is the post that Dunk was referring to:

31/03/2010 08:27 AM An update
The_Informer
April 17 is an important date for the future of Liverpool Football Club.

Yes, Dunk really was trying to present that as a triumph for KopTalk.

Two points need to made here. Firstly, the only place the 17th was an important date was in Oldham’s feverish imagination. News of Gillett and Hicks stepping down from the board, and of Broughton’s appointment, broke on April 9th. BarCap’s involvement was first reported on April 10th. The club’s official announcement about Broughton came on April 16th. So, as hopelessly vague as Oldham/The_Informer was, he still got it wrong.

KopTalk’s non-existent “insiders” got it wrong yet again – this time about Torres’s injury

With all of Dunk’s alleged contacts within the club and the national press, you’d think he would have given his members the heads up on the Torres injury situation before it appeared in the papers. But these “contacts” are just a money-making figment of his imagination, so he knew nothing until this report in The Telegraph was published:

10:29AM BST 12 Apr 2010
Liverpool could be without Fernando Torres for the rest of the season after Rafael Benitez left the striker out of the squad that drew with Fulham yesterday due to the recurrence of a knee injury.
Torres, who has scored 22 times in all competitions this season is due to visit a specialist today.
“He has a problem with his knee and has gone to see a specialist,” the Spanish manager said after the uninspired 0-0 draw at Anfield. “We are waiting for news.”
Torres was sidelined for a month at the start of the year after undergoing surgery on his knee, and when asked if the problem was likely to keep his first-choice striker out for a similar period of time, Benitez said: “We don’t know really, it depends on the specialists tomorrow (Monday). He had a problem before and we were trying to protect him.”

Seven hours later, Oldham managed to put out the following rehash of that article:

12/04/10 05:36 PM Fernando Torres checks in with knee specialist
KopTalk Team  Administrator
Fernando Torres has spent Monday with a specialist following the recurrence of his knee injury.
The Liverpool striker played no part against Fulham yesterday as a result of the ongoing problem that has held him back for most of the season.
Speaking after yesterday’s 0-0 draw, Reds boss Rafa Benitez said: “He has a problem with his knee and has gone to see a specialist. We are waiting for news.
“We don’t know really [how long he will be out for], it depends on the specialists tomorrow. He had a problem before and we were trying to protect him.”
Reports here in Spain today claim that Torres could be out for the rest of the season but there is no confirmation of such at Anfield.

By this time, Torres was already on his way to Spain to see a specialist. If Oldham had any real contacts, he would have known this. But he doesn’t, so he again didn’t report the news until after it had been revealed by the national press.

In the KopTalk articles below, when Oldham refers to “KopTalk sources”, what he actually means is earlier articles by Guillem Balague and The Mirror’s David Maddock.

Only one Liverpool website tried to make money out of those malicious Gerrard rumours – KopTalk

Last month, those poisonous rumours about Steven Gerrard appeared on pretty much every football forum in the country. On most Liverpool sites, the threads were either deleted or mods stepped in to quash the speculation.

Only one Liverpool forum attempted to make money from them – KopTalk. This should come as no surprise, as Oldham did exactly the same thing the last time malicious gossip about Gerrard circulated, back in 2006. You can read a blog article about that here.

This time, a KT “member” called posh1 posted the Gerrard email/text on the site. There are several reasons why “posh1” is probably Dunk in disguise:

1. He presents information that’s already in the public domain as his own “insider” info
2. He’s lying
3. He’s a very bad liar
4. He pays Dunk a ridiculous and entirely underserved compliment

22/04/10 11:54 AM Expect news on Gerrard this weekend!
posh1
Work colleague has a friend in media circles (he gave us the early wire on the John Terry saga), anyway he’s just told us that there’s going to be some news breaking this weekend about our captain. [THE SAME CRAP THAT HAD ALREADY APPEARED ON COUNTLESS OTHER FOOTBALL FORUMS] Obviously don’t shoot the messenger, don’t post very often and only do if I think its relevant!
Dunk might be able to shed some light as he usually gets the heads up on stories in the press.
Needless to say the story may shed some light on Gerrards form this year!

Unfortunately for posh1/Dunk, when you look at all the posts he has made on KopTalk, you can see that he’s lying – not one of them was about the John Terry saga:

Within the hour, Oldham was advertising this “story” on the KopTalk front page with one of the headlines he uses to tempt Liverpool fans into paying him €41.